Humor
You're so scary that even your hairline ran away.
How do you make a blow job OSHA compliant? You add a railing!
If having sex for money makes you a wh*re, then what does having sex for free make you?
Non-profit wh*reganisation.
What do you call a religious drug addict?
A crystal methodist.
What do you call a shoe made by George Floyd?
The Breath Takers.
joe mama roast
Two terrorists walk into a bar.
The bartender asks what they are talking about. Terrorist 1 says, "We are going to kill 14k people and a donkey."
The Bartender asks, "Why a donkey?"
Then Terrorist 2 says, "See, I told you no one would care about the 14k people."
Is it incest if it’s out in the open?
Or is it... outcest?
What do you call a stand-up comedian if the comedian doesn’t have legs?
What do you call Dr. Disrespect on top of a building?
Diddler on the Roof.
What do vegetarian zombies eat?
Graaaaiins.
What do you call a sandwich 🥪 full of envy?
Peanut Butter n' Jealousy! 😂
What do you call a prostitute with no arms or legs?
Cash and carry.
John
Why did the Canadian cross the road?
To say sorry to the other side.
Knock knock! Who's there? Deja. Deja who? Knock knock!
Where did Sally go when the explosion happened?
Everywhere!
Hey girl, are you suicide? 'Cause I think of you everyday.
- Got myself a bathroom scale so now I know exactly how much I poop.
- Right. So you weigh yourself before and after you poop and calculate the difference? That’s cool.
- Oh...that might actually be even easier.
What do you call a group of transgender women? Ex-Men.
Boobs are like batteries...
AA will get the job done...
C is bigger than AA...
D is bigger that C...
...and if they're square, you don't want to put your tongue on them!