Sandwich jokes
What do you call a sandwich 🥪 full of envy?
Peanut Butter n' Jealousy! 😂
Why is jelly laughing a lot?
Because his friend goes nuts!
A sandwich is a sandwich, but a Manwich is a meal.
-- Jeffery Dahmer
A sandwich walks into a bar.
Bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve food here."
Three construction workers were sitting on the bridge that they were building, having their lunch break. The first guy says, "If I get a Vegemite sandwich again, I am going to jump off this bridge." The second guy says, "If I get a peanut butter sandwich again, I am going to jump off this bridge." The third guy says, "If I get another strawberry jam sandwich, then I am going to jump off this bridge." The next day, the first guy gets a Vegemite sandwich, the second guy gets a peanut butter sandwich, and the third guy gets a strawberry jam sandwich. All three guys jump off the bridge and die. The next day at their funerals, the first wife says, "If he just told me, I would have given him a different sandwich." The second guy's wife says, "It is all my fault. If only I knew." The third wife says, "I don't get it, he makes his own lunch."
What do you call a guy with a sandwich?
A guy with a sandwich.
What's the difference between a baby and a sandwich?
I don't f**k a sandwich before I eat it.
My husband told me to make him a sandwich. I was looking online for some comebacks. Someone online said, "You better come back with a goddamn sandwich!"
Today, I saw my friend go crazy eating her ham sandwich. When she went to the bathroom, I checked inside her ham sandwich, and there were fresh drugs.
What do you call Panera bread when it’s on top of someone?
Panera head.
I love how in horror movies the person calls out, "Hello," as if the psycho will answer, "Hey, what's up? I'm in the kitchen. Want a sandwich?"
What sandwich spread makes people itch?
Flea-nut butter.
What did the blond say about the new iPhone?
Krabby Patty jizz sandwich.
My girlfriend didn't bring me the sandwich, so I brought the gas.
Me and my girlfriend were planning on having sex, but I said me and my little brother share a bunk bed and he’s on the bottom. She said tell him we’re making sandwiches so we came up with a plan. "Tomato" means harder and "cheese" means faster. So we were having sex and she was screaming, "Tomato, tomato, tomato, cheese, cheese, cheese," then my little brother said, "Can y’all stop making sandwiches? You're getting mayonnaise all over my bed."
What's white, yellow and goes 40 mph?
A train driver's egg sandwich.
What's a shark's favorite sandwich? Peanut butter and jellyfish!
Sandwiches are yummy! 😋
Geowipp Grand Prize. And the CHOICE OF FOOD IS INSANE. We love him and we love him.
August is a guy from one of the shops, and we became a sundwich durk through Habin. We have GOT GO GO, IT WAS GRAT. That's why. But we don't do everything.
Why will we never get hungry in the desert?
We have lots of sand-which's.