Why did the Canadian cross the road?
To say sorry to the other side.
Humor
What do you call a ghost bee?
Boobees.
What time is it when you get home, can you walk home and walk?
Teacher: Hey Timmy (the quiet kid), what comes after X?
The quiet kid: Splosion.
Teacher: What comes after A?
The quiet kid: AK-47.
Teacher: Faints.
What time is bedtime at Michael Jackson’s house?
When the big hand touches the little hand.
How does Michael Jackson pick his nose?
Out of a catalogue. 😁
A wife asked her husband, "What do you like most in me, my pretty face or my sexy body?"
He looked at her from head to toe and replied, "I like your sense of humor!"
What kind of man would be a lesbian's best friend? A decimen.
Every time I tell a 911 joke, it bombs.
Fun fact: The body positivity movement is the only movement without any actual movement.
Why are girls and rocks so alike?
If they're flat, they get skipped.
Why did the brother cross the road? Because the sister farted.
What's 10 inches and makes women scream?
Cot death!
Q: What do you call a Mexican man that lost his car?
A: Carlos.
I didn't fart. My ass likes you so much, it just blew you a kiss!
What did the sand say when it got into a fight with the ocean?
"Oh my God, you're such a beach!"
Do you know why you should never let a blonde handle grenades?
They'll end up only throwing the pin.
A man in conversation with his friend says that his wife is on a 3-week diet. The friend curiously asks, how much has she lost? The man replies, "her life."
How many dead prostitutes does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
More than three because the basement is still dark!
What do you call a Native American with a boner?
A redwood.
