Health jokes
Your Dad.
A woman was 3 months pregnant when she fell into a coma. After 6 months, she woke up. She asked the doctor, "How's the baby?"
"You had twins," the doctor replied. "Your brother named them."
The woman said, "Oh no, not my brother! What did he call them?"
The doctor said, "He called the girl Denise."
"What about the boy?" the woman asked.
The doctor said, "Denephew."
What's the difference between an American 12-year-old and an African 12-year-old? About 40 pounds.
What do you call a ruptured Chinese man?
One Hung Lo.
What is the difference between eating a baby and a doughnut?
Babies are healthier.
lol again
It’s sad how my friend was struck from the medical register for sleeping with a patient.
He was a great vet.
Doctor: I diagnose you with obesity.
Patient: It runs in the family.
Doctor: Nothing can run in your family.
I would've made a joke about Alzheimer's, too bad I forgot about it...
Why did the serial killer let the guy in a wheelchair go? Because the guy didn’t really have any body for the serial killer to stab.
What does an electric-type Pokémon say when they get gassy while drinking milk?
I’m Zaptos intolerant!
Roses are red, My c0ck is blue, Oh shit, what happened to you?
What did COVID say to the American?
Nothing, it just took its breath away...
My back is straighter than I am, and I literally have scoliosis.
Why do oranges wear sunscreen? So they don't peel.
Comment if you're not vaccinated and don't plan to be!
I bet when you were born, the doctor looked away because of your virginity.
A transgender woman with cancer of the tits only has to pay for half the operation.
I'M SOOOO SAD. (I have depression btw)
Why did the Nurse bring a red pen to work? To draw Blood.
Why did the M&M go to school? To be a smartie.
Why did the monkey bring a ladder to school? To be in highschool.
I got kicked out of the hospital for saying, "Stay Positive," to the corona patients.