What did the wind say to the palm tree? Hold onto your nuts this is no ordinary blow job.

I nutted on the wall, call that a walnut.

Nutted in her braces, now my kids are behind bars.

What do you call a nut on a Wheelchair?..a busted nut.

Why do vegetarians give good head? Beause they’re used to eating nuts.

What did the nut chasing the other nut say? Imma cashew

Do you know Imagine Dragons Yeah Imagine Dragon my nuts across your face

What is the difference between beer nuts and deer nuts? Well beer nuts are 49 cents but deer nuts are just under a buck. (If you don’t understand the genders of deer you won’t understand it.)

Why did the squirrel do the backstroke? He wanted to keep his nuts dry.

A Pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel attached to his dick. The Bartender asks him why And the Pirate says: Argh, It’s driving me nuts.

A penis has a sad life. His hair is a mess. His family is nuts. His neighbor is an asshole. His best friend is a pussy. And his owner beats him.

What does a robot do at the end of a one night stand? – He nuts and bolts.

A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. “But why?” they asked, as they moved off. “Because”, he said, “I can’t stand chess-nuts boasting in an open foyer.”

A GUY GOES TO SEE HIS PSYCHIATRIST DRESSED ONLY IN BUBBLE WRAP. WHEN HE GETS THERE HE ASKED THE PSYCH, cAN YOU PLEASE HELP ME? THE PSYCH SAYS NO, I’M SORRY, I CAN CLEARLY SEE YOUR NUTS.

A pirate walked into a bar with his ship’s steering wheel hanging off his pants. The bartender says, “Hey! What’s with the steering wheel?” The pirate says, “I don’t know but it’s driving me nuts!”

Yo girl…do you like squirrels, because i’m about to nut in your hole

What do u call a 3 sum with a girl with aids?

Nut in the butt

DR Brody: Sir your son has a disease called boofa dad: whats boofa? DR Brody: both of these nuts in your mouth

In school, we learned that squirrels stick their nuts in trees. So, just like my uncle dave…

What do squirrels and men have in common? They always want a nut.