Nutrition jokes
What's the difference between a baby and a baked potato?
About 140 calories.
What do fish take to stay healthy?
Vitamin Sea.
Why don’t oranges 🍊 go around blind?
Because they take Vitamin See!
I'm not fat!!
I'm a Nutritional Overachiever.
What do you call a group of chubby trans-genders?
Trans-fats.
What's the difference between a baby and a sweet potato? About 140 calories.
Why did the orange go blind? Because he was low on vitamin C.
What's the difference between a child and a carrot? About 140 calories.
If you’re forced to have it as a child, you won’t like it as an adult.
I guess Hitler was forced to have vegetables when he was younger.
doctor: you need to eat healthy.
me: no.
doctor: the last patient who didn't change their diet after I suggested it died.
me: oh my goodness.
doctor: in a plane crash.
me: that sounds unrelated.
doctor: I'm the one that crashed it. Do not disobey me!
Why are there no pharmacies in Africa?
Because you can’t take medicine on an empty stomach.
An apple a day, or you'll die anyway.
So I heard Kenny's mom got moved to a nursing home.
He'll probably leave her alone now.
He doesn't eat vegetables.
What's the difference between a chickpea and a lentil?
I've never had a lentil on my face.
If you're fat and transgender, then would you be considered trans fat?
It turns out a major new study recently found that humans eat more bananas than monkeys. It's true.
I can't remember the last time I ate a monkey.
Did you hear about the tomato and the lettuce race?
Well, the lettuce was ahead, and the tomato was trying to ketchup!
Why is the orange so blind? Because it needs to take Vitamin C!
Michael Jackson had an allergic reaction after eating 12-year-old nuts.
What do Olympic sprinters eat before a race?
Nothing. They fast!