What do you call a giraffe giving a blow job to another giraffe?
Getting neck!
I've recently been treated with Asthma and have been prescribed penicillin. One day I was taking it and a man screaming "SUIII" came into the room and stole it! He thought the penicillin would give him penalties. I couldn't breathe, shame on you Penaldo for ruining my life!
Q/ how do you punish a blind person
A/ give them a gun and tell the its a hairdryer
A boy tried to give a tree a high-five but instead, he ended up hanging
"Jimmy Jimmy, Yes Papa,"
"Give away my Money, No Papa,"
"Telling Lies, OK, Ima Check my Bank Account."
What's the difference between a blowjob and cough syrup?
They can both give you relief and make you gag at the same time.
Like this,
it will give you good luck. See for yourself!
What did Santa give the mute, blind, quadriplegic orphan at Christmas?
Chlamydia.
Your forehead is so big that your mom stayed in the delivery room just to give birth to your head.
Teach a Scouser to fish and he can eat for a day.
Give him the rod and he will stick it in your letterbox and nick your car keys!
Me: Truth or dare?
Crush: Dare.
Me: I dare you to give me your phone number.
Crush: Umm nevermind, truth.
Me: Ok, what is your phone number?
You're so poor, if I ever broke into your house, I'd give you things.
Are you a builder, because you give me an erection.
When life gives you lemons... call them yellow oranges and sell 'em for double the price!
POV: Me going to jail after giving the orphan kid a computer without the motherboard.
Once my twin brother died from a plane crash. His last words were, "If it's a bomb, I'll give it a 9/11."
Daveon says, "Oh wow, she's so beautiful!" The doctor then says, "Yes, but sadly, your wife didn't make it..." Daveon then states, "Give me the one my wife made then!"
What do priests give children?
Syphilis.
How are Black people like communism?
Because they’ll never work, but some of them are willing to give it a shot.
Why is it wrong to drive around in a van offering children candy?
Because you’ll have more success if you give out video games!
