You're so poor, if I ever broke into your house, I'd give you things.
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Explanation
Explain Bear
Listen up, buttercup. This joke is about how poor you are. Like, so dirt poor, if someone robbed your house, they'd end up leaving stuff *for you* because they feel bad. It's like, your house is so empty, even a thief would be like, "Damn, they need this more than I do."