Give jokes
Why don't nurses like giving old people baths or showers?
Because they don't want their vegetables to get soggy.
Why couldn't the horse give out a speech?
Option one: Horses can't speak at all.
Option two: His voice was a little *hoarse*.
Why do orphans love baseball?
Because it gives them a home to run to.
I hope you see this plugin, but if you're listening to this, I really want to give you a little more...
Me: Can you give me some drumsticks to eat?
Brother: Why though?
Me: So I can just drum up an appetite.
The best part of working at an orphanage is you can give them family-size chips.
Little Jim's friend told him that if he farts, he will give him a tenner. Little Jim tries to fart, but he poos himself, and he is bullied until he puts the poo on the bullies' face.
I want to be a pornstar. Even if I completely suck, they will still give me a firm raise.
Q. Why couldn't Terri Schiavo give good blow jobs?
A. She didn't know how to swallow.
What did the rapper say to the fridge?
"Give me a BEET!"
"I'd love to give everyone another shot."
Harry, 26, works at the women's clinic.
Roses are red, violets are blue, give me free OnlyFans so I don't touch the youth.
How do you embarrass an archaeologist? You give him a tampon and ask what period it's from.
How do you keep a blind person entertained? Give them a piece of sandpaper and tell them it’s a word.
Q: You know what's morbid at a storage sale?
A: They give you more bids.
Always breathing down my neck, my vampire girlfriend does not give me any space.
I think your hairline might have the hiccups.
Answer to it: You might have to give it a wash in the shower.
If a lawyer gives birth to a stillborn baby, is it considered a miscarriage of justice?
I would give you a thrashing, but that would be animal abuse.
I bought my fat wheelchair son a treadmill for his birthday, then that big brainless special motherfucker cried over it and threw a fit cuz his fat special ass couldn't get up out of his wheelchair and said for Jesus to raise him up and give him working and movable legs.