Food jokes
What's the difference between you and an egg?
An egg gets laid.
When ordering food at a new restaurant, my wife asked the waiter what they do to prepare their chicken.
“Nothing special,” he explained. “We just tell them they’re going to die.”
Your momma so ugly, when the Kool-Aid man burst in the door, he said, "Oh no!"
Why were the Twin Towers mad?
Because they ordered pepperoni and got plane. (Yes, it's "plain," shut.)
Yo mama so fat, she likes long, romantic walks to the refrigerator.
Q: How do you know if a gang of Chinese people robbed your house?
A: All the rice is gone.
Who hates going to a pizza party?
A weirdough.
Q) What’s the difference between a baby and a sweet potato?
A) About 400 calories.
What’s the difference between a gay man and a refrigerator?
The refrigerator won’t fart when you pull the meat out.
What do you call the bell at the Asian restaurant?
I'm ta ping it, some ting won.
Why couldn’t the orange cross the road? Because it ran out of juice.
Hi! Welcome to Papa John's abortion clinic, where yesterday's meat is today's treat. How may I be of service?
Son: Why don't cannibals eat clowns?
Dad: Don't know, why?
Son: Because they taste funny.
My friend says, "You should try Oreos with water."
Me: No, because my dad actually came back with the milf.
When you tell an Asian kid it’s raining cats and dogs and he’s like, “Just open your mouth and close your eyes!”
What's long and black?
The line at Popeyes.
Why did the chickens cross the road?
To get to KFC.
A pecan is motivated because pe-can do anything.
The peanut gained confidence and finally came out of its shell.
Q: Why did the student eat his homework?
A: Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake!