Food jokes

What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?

An apple gets picked.

What is a cow that's good at math good for?

Meat pie.

What’s the difference between a fruit and an orphan? One gets chosen :)

Your forehead so big you got to take Tylenol pills, big like chocolate chip cookies.

Your momma is so dumb that when they said it was chilly outside, she came outside with a bowl.

I'm on a seafood diet. I see food and I eat it! 😌

What do you call a Turk eating turkey?

A cannibal.

What do they feed a gorilla in Paris?

Ape Suzettes.

Yo mama so fat that if we cut her open, we could stop world hunger.

What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?

Apples get picked.

WOULD YOU RATHER:

Eat 20 lbs of cow s**t?

or

Drink a gallon of sperm?

Time flies like an arrow, fruit flies like an apple.

A burger walks into a bar and says, "Hi sir, can I have a glass of water?"

And the waiter says, "I'm sorry sir, we don't serve food here."

What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?

The apple gets picked.

What did the egg say to the other egg?

Nothing, they can't talk.

What did the orange say to the other orange?

I orange you glad!

What do tofu and a dildo have in common? They're both meat substitutes.

What’s the most artistic fruit?

Vincent mango.

What’s the difference between cereal and a baby?

I personally think cereal is not nutritious.

Potatoes