Chicken

Chicken Jokes

Death

Son: Dad? Why is mommy no longer with us?

Dad: Why did the chicken cross the road?

Son: Why?

Dad: To get to the other side, but your mother only made it about halfway.

Jimmy

If you had 10 chicken nuggets and Jimmy tried to steal one, what would you have?

10 chicken nuggets and a dead Jimmy.

Homework

Teacher: Kids, what does a chicken give you?

Students: Eggs.

Teacher: Very good. Now, what does the pig give you?

Kids: Bacon.

Teacher: Excellent. Now, what does the fat cow give you?

Kids: Homework.

Road

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was emotionally distressed after a break up and wanted to find some help at his friend's pen. In the end, he was run over by a car, marking a sad end to what might have been a good chicken's life.

Animal

What animal gets easily offended? The chicken; they always get roasted.

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  • Eggplant

    Why did the boy put a chicken 🐔 in his garden?

    He wanted to grow an eggplant. 😂

    Animal

    How do chickens 🐔 get stronger and stronger?

    They egg-xercise every day!

    Albert Einstein

    When Albert Einstein was making the rounds of the speaker’s circuit, he usually found himself eagerly longing to get back to his laboratory work. One night as they were driving to yet another rubber-chicken dinner, Einstein mentioned to his driver (a man who somewhat resembled Einstein in looks & manner) that he was tired of speechmaking.

    “I have an idea, boss,” his driver said. “I’ve heard you give this speech so many times. I’ll bet I could give it for you.” Einstein laughed loudly and said, “Why not? Let’s do it!”

    When they arrived at the dinner, Einstein donned the driver's cap and jacket and sat in the back of the room. The driver gave a beautiful rendition of Einstein’s speech and even answered a few questions expertly.

    Then a supremely pompous professor asked an extremely esoteric question about anti-matter formation, digressing here and there to let everyone in the audience know that he was nobody’s fool. Without missing a beat, the driver fixed the professor with a steely stare and said, “Sir, the answer to that question is so simple that I will let my driver, who is sitting in the back, answer it for me.”

    Man

    Why did the man say chickens were lucky?

    Because they get killed and eaten.

    Mozart

    Why did Mozart kill all his chickens?

    When he asked who the best composer was, they all replied, "Bach, Bach, Bach."

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  • Turkey

    Why did the turkey cross the road twice?

    To prove he wasn’t a chicken!