Egg jokes
What's the difference between eggs and you? Eggs get laid, you don't.
Teacher: Kids, what does a chicken give you?
Students: Eggs.
Teacher: Very good. Now, what does the pig give you?
Kids: Bacon.
Teacher: Excellent. Now, what does the fat cow give you?
Kids: Homework.
Why did the chicken crack the safe?
To get to her nest egg.
What does an evil hen lay?
Deviled eggs! 😈🥚
Why don't dinosaurs lay eggs?
Because they're EGGstinct!
What did the egg say to the other egg?
Nothing, they can't talk.
What do eggs like doing on stage?
Cracking jokes!
A pancake and an egg walk into a bar. The bartender says, “Sorry, we don’t serve breakfast.”
Crack me, break me, love me, and you ate me--egg.
A programmer and his wife.
She says, "We're out of bread. Please go to the grocery store and buy one. And if they've got eggs, get six."
After a while, he's back with six loaves of bread.
The wife asks, "Why did you buy 6 loaves of bread?"
He replies, "They had eggs."
Are you enjoying my yolks? I bet they're making you crack up. If not, I better scramble.
What did the blender say to the orange juice?
"What the fuck are you, you are so fucking stupid, shut the fuck up."
- I think you're EGGcellent.
+ Wow... You really CRACK ME UP with that joke. I think you're a EGGxtraordinary comedian.
- Really? Are you done yet?.
+ Are you kidding? I have a DOZEN of them.
How do chickens 🐔 get stronger and stronger?
They egg-xercise every day!
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
To get to the other side.
Somebody told another person that they would meet at the crack of dawn.
Let's just say Dawn got very mad.
Eggs are so egg-cellent that they are sunny-side up.
The Breakfast Couples: (Bacon) - Don't go bacon my heart.
(Egg) - I couldn't if I fried.
A piece of toast and a hard boiled egg walked into a bar. The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve breakfast here."
A rooster ran across the border from the USA to Canada and laid an egg. Which country does that egg belong to? Roosters don't lay eggs.