Why doesn’t my egg wants to crack? Because I hate my egg-sistence.

Are you enjoying my yolks. I bet there making you crack up. If not, I better scrammble

Teacher:Kids what does a chicken give you

Students: Eggs

Teacher: Very good now what does the pig give you

Kids: Bacon

Teacher: Excellent now what does the fat cow give you

Kids: Homework

A programmer and his wife.

She says, “We’re out of bread. Please go the grocery store and buy one. And if they’ve got eggs, get six.”

After a while, he’s back with six loaves of bread.

The wife asks, “Why did you buy 6 loaves of bread?”

He replies, “They had eggs.”

So, I know that there are a lot of egg YOLKS on this website, and I guess I got BEAT to it, but I’m EGGcited to say EGGsactly what the eggs say. I know I;m bad at this but I hope you will crack up anywat

Why don’t dinosaurs lay eggs? Because they’re EGGstinct!

I was cooking eggs the other day. It was very EGGxiting, all though, I was EGGxaggerating, but, if you think that wasn’t funny to you, then your hard boiled, that’s all for today YOLKS, so I said before several cats starting fighting, that sht was a CATastrophe, these kittens were all like “You’ve gotta be KITTEN me.” Mean while, in the ocean, they just waved, SEA what I did there? You SHORE you didn’t? Oh, alright, that’s okay bud- I guess these ocean puns are too DEEP for you. No? Okay- but, you know why the skeleton was lonely, eh? Oh, cause he had NO BODY. Why didn’t the skeleton ask the girl out? He didn’t have the guts. What did the skeleton do to his gf? He BNED her. No? Alright. Those didn’t make you laugh? Maybe I should hit your funny bone.

Aren’t my egg yolks amazing, don’t they make you crack up. If not, I better scramble

What did the egg say to the boiling water? It might take a while for me to get hard because I just got laid last night.

what’s the difference between eggs,and you?eggs get laid,you don’t.

Mary Poppins went to a restaurant and ordered cheese, eggs and cauliflower. When she left, she had written something in the complaint box: super cauliflower, eggs but cheese was quite atrocious. (Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious)

The Breakfast Couples: (Bacon)-Don’t go bacon my heart (Egg)-I couldn’t if I fried

A piece of toast and a hard boiled egg walked into a bar. The bartender says, “Sorry, we don’t serve breakfast here.”

My wife went to make a cake the recipe said separate two eggs so she put one egg in the living room

Before the chicken or the egg there was only Chuck Norris.

A rooster ran across the border from the USA to Canada and laid an egg. Which country does that egg belong to?

Roosters don’t lay eggs.

Why did the chicken cross the road

He forgot his eggs

I have a lot of eggculaint egg puns, get the yolk… oh come on don’t be hard boiled

Are you an egg, cause you CRACK me up

I forgot my lucky egg! It always gives me an eggcellent amount of luck!

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