There is an upside to being an orphan. Every bag of chips is family size.
What’s the similarity between a bag of chips and a gun?
When you pull one out in class, everybody wants to be your friend.
The emo kid ran away after his parents asked why they took the barcode sticker off the Oreos.
Dating a stripper is like eating a bag of chips in class.
Everyone looks at you in disgust, but deep down inside they want some too.
Little Johnny got detention because when he was walking to lunch, he saw a bowl of apples and there was a note on it that said, "Take 1, God is watching." He continued walking and saw a bowl of cookies that said, "Take 1, please." So little Johnny made his own note and he wrote, "Take as many cookies as you want, God is watching the apples."
Being an orphan isn't all bad. On the bright side, all your snacks are family-sized.
For orphans, every bag of chips is family size.
Happiness is like food, not everyone gets it.
What did the nut chasing the other nut say? "I'mma cashew!"
Daughter: Mommy?
Mom: Hey.
Daughter: What kind of kids do they use to make Sour Patch Kids?
Mom: They don’t use kids to make Sour Patch Kids.
Daughter: Oh, that’s why the ones I made taste kind of funny...
What food does a cheetah eat?
Fast food.
When we were visiting the Hoover Dam, I started to get a bit hungry. I asked my parents, "Where's the dam snack bar?"
What is six inches, has nuts, and is hard?
A sinkers bar.
What do Michael Jackson and caviar have in common? They both come on little white crackers.
Like this if you are a single Pringle like me.
What is the difference between a baby and a watermelon?
One is a refreshing summertime snack; the other one is a watermelon.
What do french fries 🍟 do when they meet?
They ketchup.
What's the only good thing about being an orphan?
All snacks are family sized!
Blue Takis?
What did the bread say to the peanut butter? "I think your nuts."
