Why can't blind people have a sea food diet?
They have to see the food to eat
What is the difference between a feminist and a vegetarian? A vegetarian doesn't eat meat for moral, religious, or health reasons. However, a feminist doesn't act like a bitch for moral, religious, or health reasons.
Losing weight is a piece of cake. Just don't pick it up.
Today I learned humans eat more bananas than monkeys. -- I can't remember the last time I ate a monkey.
Why do vegetarians give good head?
Because they’re used to eating nuts.
A wife and husband had been on a strict diet and the wife said yaknow weve been good about our diet lets have a cheat night tonight. The wife came home with kfc and wendys. the husband came home with sylvia from the office.
It’s really hard to maintain a good body lately, unless you put it in a freezer
Im not fat!!
Im a Nutritional Overachiever
What do you call a group of chubby trans-genders?
Trans-fats.
Why did the orange go blind? Because he was low on vitamin C.
Becoming a vegetarian is a huge missed steak.
What's the difference between a child and a carrot? About 140 calories.
why are people in japan so slim. bcuz the last time a fatman came the lost half their population
What is the toughest thing about living a vegan life?
Getting up at 5am to milk the almonds.
doctor: you need to eat healthy
me: no
doctor: the last patient who didn't change their diet after i suggested it died
me: oh my goodness
doctor: in a plane crash
me: that sounds unrelated
doctor: i'm the one that crashed it. do not disobey me
I'm on sea- food diet, I see food and eat it.
How do you know if someone is a vegan or has run a marathon?
They'll tell you.
Relationships are like fat people.
Most of them don’t work out.
Why don’t cannibal kids eat people with Down Syndrome? Because kids don’t like vegetables.
What do you call a gun that doesn't kill anyone?
- A VEGUN.
