World War II jokes
Did you know that Germany came up with sparkling water?
Who else would think of adding gas?
Do you know why the Japanese have squinted eyes? Because nukes are bright.
What can an Olympic runner do that Hitler can't?
Finish a race.
My grandpa was amazing. He killed Hitler.
What planet did Hitler hate the most?
Jewpiter.
Apparently, describing the beautiful city of Hiroshima as "The bomb" is not okay.
Why did the Japanese NOT shoot down the American plane that was dropping atomic bombs?
From what their eyes saw, it was a piece of rice.
Why do Nazis not wear necklaces, rings, and bracelets? Because they hate jewelry.
The gas prices are going up so much that even Hitler is killing himself.
A family of three, a dad, a mom, and a 12 year old son are driving in the car when the dad says, “How about we play a little game of two truths and a lie? It’ll be fun.”
“Ok,” the mom and son reply happily.
“Let me start,” says the son.
“Ok, go ahead,” replies the mom.
“I hate video games, I hate school, and I love junk food,” says the son.
“Ooh ooh! You do love junk food, you do hate school, and you don’t hate video games.” Says the mom.
“You’re right!” He replies.
“I’ll go next,” says the dad. “I love your mom, you’re adopted, and my dad almost died in WWII.”
“Hmm... Your dad did not almost die in WWII, obviously I’m not adopted, and you do love my mom.” Says the son.
“The lie isn’t that you’re adopted,” says the dad.
Person 1: "Where was Hiroshima?"
Person 2: "In Japan."
Person 1: "No wonder! That's why they never saw it coming."
Hitler.
If Hitler had a cooking channel: Step one... Turn on the gas.
Why can't Hitler join track?
Because he can't even finish a race.
Why do Japanese people hate Christmas?
Because the last time a "FatMan" went down their chimney they lost half of their population.
Why do the Japanese hate Christmas?
Because the last time a Fat Man came down the chimney, they lost half their population.
I just watched a documentary about Adolf Hitler.
He sure was a popular guy. Everywhere he went, people shouted “Hi Hitler” and gave him a little wave.
What is Hitler's favorite game?
Nahtzee.
Where did Hitler send kids with ADHD?
Concentration camp.
What did Hitler say when he was blindfolded?
I can Nazi!