I named my dog "5 miles," so now I can tell people I walk "5 miles" everyday. 😏😎
Animal Jokes
What do turtles use to communicate?
A shellphone!
What do you call a flying sheep?
A muttonbird.
Why did the chicken cro-
UM, ACTUALLY, THE CHICKEN CAN'T CROSS THE ROAD UNLESS IT'S UNDER SOME ROOSTER OR HEN SUPERVISION OR ELSE THE CAR WILL CRASH THE CHICKEN, AND THEY WILL DIE. 🤓
What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato.
Why was the bee’s hair sticky?
He used honeycomb.
I had asked my dog what 2 - 2 is...
She said nothing.
Why couldn’t anyone see the bird?
Because it was in da skies.
How do you confuse a fish?
Put it in a round fishbowl and tell it to go to the corner!
A bat mitzvah for sheep is a baaaaaat mitzvah!
What did the cops do when 600 hares escaped the zoo?
The cops had to comb the area.
What do you call a pig that knows karate?
Pork-chop!
I have a joke about death.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side.
Think about it :)
What did the duck eat for lunch?
Soup and quackers.
My bird. PRETTY BIRD! PRETTY BIRD!
Others CHIRP CHIRP CHIRP!
What are cow jokes considered?
Cheesy.
What did the cow say to your mom?
Hello.
How do you catch a polar bear?
Cut a hole in the ice, put peas around it, when the polar bear goes to take a pea, you kick him in the ice hole.
What is a cat's favorite Queen song... Don't stop meow.
Why did Beethoven get rid of his chickens?
They were always saying "Bach, Bach, Bach". And his cows preferred Moo-zak.
