Head of Company: We need to stop testing our products on animals. Consultant: Why? The shampoo companies do it. Head of Company: Yeah, but we make dildos.
on a date me - "I get to work with animals all day" her - "How sweet! What do you do?" me - “I’m a butcher.”
What is the difference between a cat and a complex sentence? – A cat has claws at the end of its paws. A complex sentence has a pause at the end of its clause.
Today I learned humans eat more bananas than monkeys. – I can’t remember the last time I ate a monkey.