Predator

Predator Jokes

Typo

Thanks to an unfortunate typo, it's the most one-sided action movie ever.

Alen vs. Predator.

Sex life

If they made a movie about your sex life, what would the title be?

Mine would be "Alien Vs. Predator."

Memes

Pedophile

What does a turtle and a pedophile have in common? They both want to get there before the hare does.

  • 6
  • Fight

    What do you call it when a Mexican and a pedophile fight?

    Alien vs Predator.

    Lion

    A lion, Johnny Depp, and a hockey player from Nashville all have one thing in common.

    They're all Predators!

    Shark

    A shark can swim faster than me, but I can run faster than a shark.

    So in a triathlon, it would all come down to whoever can ride a bike the fastest.

    Pedophile

    A pedophile pulls up to little Jonny, lowers his window and asks, "hey little boy, if I give you a lolly, will you come in my car?" Little Jonny replies, "Give me the whole packet and I’ll come in your mouth."

    Lion

    What does Michael Jackson and a lion have in common?

    They're both predators.

    Furry

    Me: I found a group of furries in the woods.

    Voice in back: Well, it looks like we're going huntin'.

    Cow

    A cow went into a pride of lions' territory.

    Since that moment, he knew his life was on the stake.

    Race

    Why did the lion lose the race? Because he was playing with a cheetah.

  • 2
  • Job loss

    A fully grown bull Great White Shark is 15 feet long and can open its jaws up to 1.2 meters long. It could eat a small child in seconds. Anyways, I lost my job at the aquarium...

    Child

    Are you a gun, because I would be your bullets because I love going in children.