Why are fish smart?
They live in a school.
Animal Jokes
Why did the dog cross the road twice?
Because he was trying to catch a boomerang.
What’s the difference between a dog and a marine biologist?
One wags its tail, and the other tags a whale!
What's a whale's favorite James Bond movie? "License to Krill."
A cow in an earthquake is called a milkshake.
Your uncle Jack is stuck on a horse.
Would you help your uncle "Jack" off the horse?
What do sloths and depressed people have in common?
They both hang from the tree.
What is a cow?
What did the frog order?
A diet Croak!
Julie: What's the difference between a chimp and a pizza?
John: I don't know.
Julie: Remind me not to send you to the store...
I named my dog Stone so that I can say to people that I throw stones every day.
What is a gorilla's favorite cookie?
It's chocolate chimp.
What do you call a very rude bird? A mockingbird.
My grandpa has the heart of a lion,
and a lifetime ban from the zoo.
Your uncle Jack is stuck on the horse...
Would you help him jack off the horse?
A flock of swallows were migrating south as a jet flew past them.
"Why was that one flying so fast?" asked one. Another answers, "Can't you see his tail is burning?"
What do you call a bird with no wings?
Moas didn't even know that existed!
How did Gertie Gorilla make the Playboy magazine?
She was ape-ril!
Who is the gorilla's favorite president of the most recent years? It's Hairy Truman.
Q: What do you get when the cow jumped over the barbed wire? A: Udder destruction!
