Animal jokes
Why did the hedgehog cross the road?
To see his flat-mate.
"Kylin milks me all day like I'm a cow."
What do you call a giraffe giving a blow job to another giraffe?
Getting neck!
Why do birds fly south?
Because it's too far to walk.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To go to Chick-fil-A.
What do you call a scared cow?
A COW-ard.
What do frogs eat?
French fries!
What do you call mouse sneakers? Squeakers!
Guys, I'm back...
Here's my joke:
What is blue and red all over?
Blood in the water of a shark attack victim.
Why is it easy to weigh fish?
Because they have their own scales! 😂😂😂😂😂😂
Why is it easy to weigh a fish?
Because they have their own scales.
Sometimes I am happy, and there are times I envy my dog.
What's a cow's strongest part of their body?
Their "calves"!
What do you call a deaf dog? As you like, he doesn't hear you anyway.
Roses are red, violets are blue,
I fucked a chimpanzee behind my local zoo.
Once I was asked to perform snail jokes at a stand-up comedy night. I certainly snailed it because the crowd thought it was shellerious.
How do you kill a sheep?
You lamb shank it!
How did the chicken 🐔 feel after escaping the fry cook?
Clucky!
My friend has glasses, and we were talking about owls, and I told my friend to give an owl glasses. I told my friend that it'd be a spectacled owl!
What do you call a duck that can fix anything? Duck tape.