Aed

Aed jokes

Papyrus

    • Papyrus: Sans, can you call Undyne for me and tell her that I found a human!

    Sans: Sure bro, lemme just get on the Tele-bone.

    Papyrus: Ssssaaaaannnnsss!!!!!!

    Sans: Yea bro.

    Papyrus: You know what? I will tell Undyne instead.

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    • Woman

    • A married woman is having an affair. Whenever her lover comes over, she puts her nine-year-old son in the closet.

    One day, the woman hears a car in the driveway and puts her lover in the closet with her son. Inside the closet, the little boy says, “It’s dark in here, isn’t it?” “Yes, it is,” the man replies. “You wanna buy a baseball?” the little boy asks. “No thanks,” the man replies. “I think you do want to buy a baseball,” the little extortionist continues. “OK. How much?” the man replies, after considering the position he was in. “Twenty-five dollars,” the little boy replies. “TWENTY-FIVE DOLLARS?!” the man repeats. “That’s awful expensive,” but because of the position he was in, agreed to the price.

    The following week, the lover is visiting the woman again when she hears a car in the driveway, and again places her lover in the closet with her little boy. “It’s dark in here, isn’t it?” the boy starts off. “Yes, it is,” replies the man. “Wanna buy a baseball glove?” the little boy asks. “OK. How much?” the hiding lover responds, acknowledging his disadvantage. “Fifty dollars,” the boy replies, and the transaction is completed.

    The next weekend, the little boy’s father says, “Hey, son. Go get your ball and glove and we’ll play some catch.” “I can’t. I sold them,” replies the little boy. “How much did you get for them?” asks the father, expecting to hear the profit in terms of lizards and candy. “Seventy-five dollars,” the little boy says. "SEVENTY-FIVE DOLLARS?! That’s thievery! I’m taking you to the church right now. You must confess your sin and ask for forgiveness," the father explains as he hauls the child away.

    At the church, the little boy goes into the confessional, draws the curtain, sits down, and says “It’s dark in here, isn’t it?” “Don’t you start that crap in here,” the priest says.

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    • Aed memes

    Car

    • So, my kid took my car. He crashed it off a bridge. I miss it, but it's going to have my car.

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    • Bee

    • These are bee puns.🐝

    I BEElieve you are eager to hear!🐝

    I love to BEE a little 9 years old writing on this page.🐝

    (Last one) I want to BEEcome a BEE. ;-; I kid... Like this now and please Subscribe to Kelly Qin on YouTube and she is my mom and she has a bake channel!

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    • Frog

    • Johnny is on his way to school when he comes across a frog. With a sudden inspirational thought, he picks the frog up, shoves a firecracker up the frog's arse, lights the cracker, and blows the frog to smithereens.

    Now at school, the teacher asks the class: "Has anybody got anything for show and tell this morning?"

    Johnny waves his arm in the air and is virtually screaming "Me mis me mis me mis".

    "Ok Johnny, what do you have to share with the class today?"

    Little Johnny then says, "Well on my way to school today I shoved a cracker up a frog's arse." The teacher interrupts and says, "It's not arse Johnny, It's rectum."

    Johnny then says, "Fucking oath it wrecked 'im."

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    • Atheism

    • "The rise of atheism is going to lead to a break down of social morals and lead to all kinds of filth, including an increase in child abuse," said the village priest.

    The village scientists did some fact checking. In prison, they found roughly 70% of child abusers were hyper religious before committing the crimes, and another 20% converted to religions to look 'remorseful'. The remaining 10% preferred not to say. They presented the findings to the media.

    "Scientists slander good religious folk and ignore the weight of evidence!"

    "Is Science biased against religion? You decide in this survey," they reported.

    The village priest is living at his majesty's convenience and tells the others he committed armed robbery.

    "Why is this a joke? It's not even funny!" said the person reading this, breaking the forth wall.

    What is funny is you got to the end of this post and didn't cringe. Why not?

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    • Maid

    • The maid asked her boss, the wife, for a raise, and the wife was upset.

    The wife asked, "Why do you think you deserve a pay increase?"

    Maid: "There are three reasons. The first is that I iron better than you."

    Wife: "Who said that?"

    Maid: "Your husband."

    Wife: "Oh."

    Maid: "The second reason is that I am a better cook than you."

    Wife: "Who said that?"

    Maid: "Your husband."

    Wife: "Oh."

    Maid: "The third reason is that I am better at sex than you."

    Wife: "Did my husband say that as well?"

    Maid: "No, the gardener did."

    Wife: "So how much do you want?"

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    • Website

    • I asked my brother who is autistic how he found his gf. He said on a special website.

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