What’s the similarity between a bag of chips and a gun?
When you pull one out in class, everybody wants to be your friend.
What's the difference between England’s football team and a tea bag?
The tea bag stays in the cup longer.
For someone to be stealing a bag of glod in heaven criminal on Earth and heaven
I killed 5 zombies and stabbed a vampire with a steak and then I started to wonder why they were carrying bags of candy.
When I'm bored, I go into an elevator with a full duffle bag. Once people come in and the door closes I zip open the bag a little bit and whisper to it "I'll get you some food once we get off"
whats the difference between Michael Jackson and a shopping bag?
ones made of plastic and is dangerous for children to play with, the other one carries your shopping.
What's the difference between Micheal Jackson and a plastic bag
One's made of plastic and dangerous for kids to play with, and the other carries groceries
what's the difference between Michael Jackson and a carrier bag? One is plastic and dangerous for kids to play with, and the other is a carrier bag.
A llama kicked me out of my house. Alpaca my bags.
The teacher of the ELA class sead that whoever answers this next question gets to go home. Then a kid sitting next ot the window threw his bag out the window. Teacher asked who threw that, he sead, Me im going home. Before he could move the teacher pointed a ruler at him and sead,"At the end of this ruler is a idiot", he got suspended for asking witch end.
A Blonde was down on her luck. In order to raise some money, she decided to kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom. She went to the playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree, and told him, "I`ve kidnapped you." She then wrote a note saying, "I`ve kidnapped your kid. Tomorrow morning, put $10,000 in a paper bag and put it under the pecan tree next to the slide on the north side of the playground. Signed, Blonde." The Blonde then taped the note to the kid`s shirt and sent him home to show it to his parents. The next morning the blonde checked, and sure enough, a paper bag was sitting beneath the pecan tree. The blonde opened the bag and found the $10,000 with a note that said, "How could you do this to a fellow Blonde?"
Cashier: Will you want the milk in a bag today sir?
Customer: I’ll just keep it in the carton if you don’t mind.
There is an upside to being an orphan... every bag of chips is family size
A teacher says to her class one day, "Whoever answers my next question, can go home." A boy throws his bag out the window.
The teacher asks, "Who just threw that?"
The boy says, "Me! I'm going home now."
I was making a coffee for my boss and this was the supposed recipe:
1 egg 1 tomato diced bell peppers a bag of sugar sea salt coffee beans rusted nails
I got fired and spent the next 20 years in prison with a dude named Papa Bear
How do You call an iPhone cover in Germany?
-An apple bag. 😜
The Yo Mama song to end all yo mama jokes
if u kno what song this is parodying you get a cookie
Well, it’s a oooh, yo mama.
Ohhh, Yo Mama.
oh wop oh wop…YO MAMA!
Yo mama so fat, she gotta bathe in Sea World.
Well, it’s a oooh, yo mama.
Ohhhh, YO MAMA!
Oh woo ohhh, YO MAMA!
Yo mama so slow she took 9 months to get the joke.
Your own motheeer makes me giggle
Her struggling to do taaaasks, see her belly wiggle.
HEY
Yo mama so fat she on both sides o’the family.
Yo mama so inbred her own fam’ly tree
Looks like a spider web an’ yo mama so hairy
I thought it was King Kong I saw, that bitch is scary.
Yo mama so dumb a kid said “gimme a fag”
And in response she kidnapped Ricardo in a giant bag
Yo mama so blind, she drove through puppies in a blunder
I swear I almost thought the driver was Stevie Wonder
Yo mama so old, she’s nostalgic for the big bang.
Drier than Sahara, that crusty old thang.
Well, it’s a oooh, yo mama.
Ohhh, Yo Mama.
oh wop oh wop…YO MAMA!
Yo Mama so fat her picture still printing out
Well, it’s a oooh, yo mama.
Ohhhh, YO MAMA!
Oh woo ohhh, YO MAMA!
Yo mama so ugly I thought you had two dads
MMMMMMM
ahhhhhh
ohhhohoh
Your own motheeer, your own motheeeeer’s pussy is tight
It’s not too dryyy or weeet it’s just right
Hey Mama!
I fucked her so hard, the bitch done passed out
but not before I creamed all over her and shout
“I’M FUCKING THESE MOMS ALL THE WAY TO HEAVEN!
Don’t care if she’s 20 or 77!
I’m doing all the moms all over the worl’
Even if they weren’t ‘riginally born a girl.
A pussy’s a pussy no matter who its from
Don’t care if that woman is smart or dumb!”
That’s the truth there, baby! Even if
yo mama too stupid to tell apart her own kid
or if she’s so fugly, she’s the reason why
Helen Keller, poor soul, went deaf and blind.
I want to fuck every MILF on Earth
it don’t matter how much her ass is worth
or if she’s so poor, coal on Christmas is a treasure
Would I fuck her anyway? It would be my pleasure.
My body count so high can’t nobody top me
She said, “I’ll call you Freddie Mercury cause I want you to rock me.”
I said, “aiight bet! Can’t nobody stop me!”
Well, it’s a oooh, yo mama.
Ohhh, Yo Mama.
oh wop oh wop…YO MAMA!
But yo mama still so poor Africans donate to her!
What did the llama say when the villagers said that he had to leave the village
All pac my bags
⚠️I’m not racist it’s just a joke⚠️
What do you call four black ppl in a sleeping bag …… A Kit Kat
