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A teacher says to her class one day, "Whoever answers my next question, can go home." A boy throws his bag out the window.

The teacher asks, “Who just threw that?”

The boy says, “Me! I’m going home now.”

There is an upside to being an orphan… every bag of chips is family size

What’s the difference between England’s football team and a tea bag?

The tea bag stays in the cup longer.

what do you call two Mexicans in a sleeping bag

A Twix

The teacher of the ELA class sead that whoever answers this next question gets to go home. Then a kid sitting next ot the window threw his bag out the window. Teacher asked who threw that, he sead, Me im going home. Before he could move the teacher pointed a ruler at him and sead,“At the end of this ruler is a idiot”, he got suspended for asking witch end.

What’s the difference between England and a tea bag? – The tea bag stays longer in a cup.

what’s the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag ones plastic and dangerous to play with the other is to carry groceries.

Look at a bag of black grapes. See how dark they are? That’s how I like my men.

25 at a time.

A blonde, burnette and a red-head are running from the police. They come across an old shack, with three burlap sacks. They each hop into one of them. The police come and kick the one with the burnette in it. She goes, “Mew, mew.” The police say, “Oh, it’s just a bag of kittens.” Then they kick the one with the red-head. “Woof, woof.” They think, “Oh, it’s just a bag of puppies.” Then they kick the one with the blonde in it. She goes, “POtaTOES!!” And gets arrested.

A llama kicked me out of my house. Alpaca my bags.

Cashier: Will you want the milk in a bag today sir?

Customer: I’ll just keep it in the carton if you don’t mind.

whats red and screams when you shake it? a skinned baby in a bag of salt

A Blonde was down on her luck. In order to raise some money, she decided to kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom. She went to the playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree, and told him, “Ive kidnapped you." She then wrote a note saying, "Ive kidnapped your kid. Tomorrow morning, put $10,000 in a paper bag and put it under the pecan tree next to the slide on the north side of the playground. Signed, Blonde.” The Blonde then taped the note to the kid`s shirt and sent him home to show it to his parents. The next morning the blonde checked, and sure enough, a paper bag was sitting beneath the pecan tree. The blonde opened the bag and found the $10,000 with a note that said, “How could you do this to a fellow Blonde?”

H: walks into bedroom Why are you packing your bags?

W: I heard in New York women get paid $400 for what I do for you for free.

Later that day

W: walks into the bedroom to see husband packing his bags What are you doing?

H: I’m going with you. I want to see how you live off of $800 a year.

What do you get when u cross a Muslim in a trench coat and a duffel bag A sad news story

How can you help a llama on holiday?

Alpaca your bags.

“Why did Susie fall off the swing?” “Because she had no arms”

“Why could she get up off the ground?” “Because she had no friends”

“Knock knock” “Who’s there?” “Not Susie, she’s still on the ground”

“Where did Susie go when the bomb went off?” “Everywhere” “Why couldn’t Susie scratch her leg?” “Because it was in a different body bag”

“Why did Susie drop her ice cream?” “She was hit by a bus”

“Why did Susie fall off the swing?” “Someone threw a refrigerator at her”

three indans get captured by an enemy leader and the leaders says "go in the woods and find 10 fruits of the same kind.The first one comes back with apples.The enemy leader says "shove them up your butt and don’t make a sound or i will kill you.He get to two and yell.The leader killed him.He goes up to heaven.The second guy come back and has grapes he gets to 9 and laughes.The leader kills him.He goes to heavenThe first guy askes the second guy why did you laugh you had it in the bag.The second guy said he say the third guy carring pineapples.

What worse than a bag of dead babies? One at the bottom is still wriggling.

whats bright red and screams when you shake it? a skinned baby in a bag of salt.