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3 europeans come to America. They all get captured by native americans and they want to kill them. But the europeans beg to have their lives spared. The native americans agreed to not kill them on one condition: the europeans must go into the forest and bring back a fruit and they will be informed what to do with it. So the first guy comes back with a peach. The native american says "Shove it up your ass, if you laugh we kill you." So, he shoves the peach up his ass and he laughs, and the native americans kill him. The second guy comes back with a grape. The native american tells him the same thing. He laughs and the native american kills him. They both see eachother in heaven and the first guy says to the second guy, "I had a peach and peaches are fuzzy so thats why I laughed, but you had a grape, what happened?" The second guy says, “Oh yea I was doing just fine until I saw the other guy come back with a pineapple!”

What do you call a gay drive by? A fruit roll up.

What’s the difference between fruit and dead babies?

I don’t put fruit in a blender.

What is beethoven’s favorite fruit? Ba na na na

What do you call a fruit that argues against the position it supports?

The Devil’s advocado.

So is a homosexual in a coma a fruit or a vegetable??

Fruit is like ex-wives…

They both look really good hanging from a tree.

John say a Gay in a wheel chair

“I didn’t know a man could be a fruit and a Vegetable”

Why did the plum put sugar under its pillow?

So it could have sweet dreams.

What fruit always feels depressed?

A blue-berry.

what do you call a gay drive by ?

a fruit roll up.

TASTE THE RAINBOW BITCH!!!

What’s a sheep’s favorite fruit?

A baaaaaaaanaaaaaana

If you ever have a gay friend whose comatose tell his family he/she was a fruit now he/she’s a vegetable at least there still in the produce section

What is a vampire’s favourite fruit?

A nectarine

If your boyfriends doesn’t get your fruit puns, you got to let that mango.

What’s the most artistic fruit

Vincent mango

Fruit is like life. You slowly eat it away as it slowly also begins to rot like everyone I’ve known.

I will tell you a story. There was a fruit named Pear who was named Dyck. He one day met his friend Carrot, who was later killed after being stuck into some girls v...... Pear then became very sadistic and no one loved him and he became mentally fruit-pressed. One day he met a Banana named Harvey Weinstein and they got married and had children who were all named minion. Eventually the rest of his family died and pear was left slowly rotting away. His last words were “I have finally ‘peared’ the consequences of all my actions.”

This disabled kid walked up to me so I asked what disease he had. He said Lima. So I said, come again? And he said Lima nuts and I asked if that was a fruit and he said. No I’m a vegetable.

What do you call a retarded fruit Mentally In-pear-ed