The 30+ Best Tip Jokes

911 whats your emergency? Me: Officer My Girlfriend is dead! Operator: What Happened!? Me: She Bit The Tip

Why did the blonde tip-toe past the medicine cabinet? The cabinet had sleeping pills.

Why do prostitutes love servicing zombies? They always leave a tip.

Ran out of toilet paper so had to start using lettuce leaves...today was the tip of the iceberg

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

I have an exam next week so I called my ex and asked if she had any cheating tips

Top tip; if your wife asks "what would you like to do to my body?" 'identify it' is the wrong answer

What’s the best part about being a circumcision doctor? The pay is good and you also get to keep the tips

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

A man walks into a bar and sees a jar of ten dollar bills so he asks the bartender if its a jar of tips. The bartender says no, its for a bet. So the man asks what the bet is and the bartender says, well if you put ten dollars into the jar then knock out the bouncer, next you go outside and remove a rotten tooth out of the rottweiler's mouth, and last you go upstairs and give an orgasm to the fat lady who has never had one. If you can do all those things then you get everything in the jar as well as free drinks for the month. So the guy puts in ten dollars, turns to the guy next to him and knocks him out with one punch. Then the guy continues outside, all you hear for an hour is screaming and whining from the dog, when all is silent the man walks in and asks, so where is the fat lady with the tooth?

How did the pornstar cut herself while using a drill? She was to used to grabbing the tip.

pro tip kids, you CAN hit an orphan because they cant cry to their parents

Tip for Kindness for the day.

Tip one. Always speak up for your self. Yes, letting someone else speak up for you is nice but also speak up for your self be brave if a mean bully comes along. Speak up for your self and others if they need it. Best-Gwen