Aed jokes
Why can’t Chinese people play baseball? Because they ate the bat.
If you don’t get it, a Chinese woman ate a bat and she got the coronavirus (I think).
A guy told me, "Nothing rhymes with orange."
So I replied, "No, it doesn't."
My crush rejected me 2 years ago, and I still have never moved on. I'll be over her when a train is over me.
I told a furry, "Don't call yourself a joke!" I said to the furry, "Joke has meanings."
Johnny, Johnny?
Yes, Papa.
Eating sugar?
Yes, Papa, I am eating sugar because it is the only thing I can reach, and you have refused to feed me for the past 3 days. You smoke 2 packs of cigs a day and you’re mad at me for eating a little sugar.
Smoking? Telling lies?
Yes, Papa, you do all of those things because you’re a chronic addict.
Guys, depression cannot be turned into a joke.
Why did the school shooter earn extra points?
Because he was on a kill streak.
Why can orphans travel around so much?
A. They never get homesick.
Imagine a dragon 🤔.
Imagine me dragging these nuts across your face.
DARK ALERT********
A girl went to the doctor. The doctor said she had one year to live. She shot the doctor, and the judge gave her 15 years.
DARK ALERT********
Dad: If you study, then I will buy you a new iPhone.
Son: Okay, I'll do it!
5 hours later...
Son: I'm done!
Dad: I lied.
Son: So did I!
Think about you are so fucking high that you are walking to a lift and inside the lift are stairs. 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Are you happy to see me, or is that a bomb strapped to your chest and a detonator in your hand?
As a lifelong farmer, I was excited that Ligue 1 was moving up the UEFA ranking toward an Industrial Revolution and I can finally leave the farm. Alas, Pessi joined and we went down a rank because he is so finished. Shame on you Pessi, now I have to go back to shoveling cow shit.
What do you call a bunch of retarded preschoolers? Tater tots.
Two balls sit inside a bucket. One turned to another and said, "Hey man, boing, are you sentient, too?"
The other one said, "I’m sapient, you are sentient!"
BOINGZINGA!?!
How much wood can a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? If you woodchuck on the world with that, you have a really deep in, and he says goodbye. When he says goodbye, you're like, "if you."
What does every pirate hate?
A small chest with no booty.
Why did the actor fall through the floor?
He was just going through a stage!
Why did a girl like bananas?
Because one day she might need to be ready.