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When your crush walks in class but youre homeschooled…

my mom said take out the trash and i said okay. the next day she asked “where is your sister”, and i said in line to get crushed.

What did the 1.8 nanosecond old baby get for his birthday?

Nailed to a puppy falling on a buzz saw being crushed in a hydraulic press while being set on fire.

Me:what’s that girls name from phinease and ferb the sister Crush:candice Me:candice dick fit in your mouth Crush: slaps me Walks away

My mom is a chemistry teacher. Mom: you can’t be attracted to something without it being attracted to you back Me: tell that to my FUKING CRUSH BTCH

What is your true crush? - A soda crush

Yo mama so fat she fell in love with a skinny dude and tried to hug him but crushed him.

A big hefty porker left his balls exposed and said "Misses!! Come here and step upon mine balls please!!! I pay top dollar for this extreme delight! She pippity popped his balls like there was no tomorrow And he said “yuh yuh ay ay crush these nuts nuts”

Someone was crushing a bag of chips i said are you making edibles

We r gonna crush u in the try not to laugh

your mama so fat that she doesn’t get crushed by cars, she crushes cars and babies in strollers on the sidewalk when she falls and doesn’t see any remains so there is no evidence.