Donald Trump Jokes
All those people claiming Donald Trump is like Hitler need a reality check.
After all, it's not like Donald Trump could write a book.
A man goes into heaven and there he meets Jesus. He asks Jesus what that broken clock is there for. Jesus says, "That is Mother Teresa's clock, it has never moved because she has never lied." "There is Abraham Lincoln's clock. He has lied twice so it has moved twice." "Where is Donald Trump's?" asks the man. Jesus answers, "It is in my office, I am using it as a ceiling fan."
Donald Trump is proud of being white, which is strange, considering he's orange. Makes you wonder why he didn't pull a Michael Jackson and bleach his own skin....
Why does Donald Trump have a fervent crush on the Russian president?
He is Putin his dick where it don't belong!
Donald: "If I lose this election, I will leave the country."
Joe: "Bi den"
Lets go i think corn
How do Mexicans feel about Trump's wall? -- They'll get over it.
Donald Trump wants to ban the sale of pre-shredded cheese.
He wants to make America grate again.
What did Donald Trump serve to Justin Trudeau at a state dinner?
Poutine with Russian dressing!
Decisions taken by world leaders often have great significance during a crisis.
The Americans, in particular, are suffering many losses during the current global pandemic. Remember, in the 1980's they had Ronald Reagan, Johnny Cash, and Bob Hope.
In 2020 they have Donald Trump, no Cash, and no Hope!
Francis Pope, Donald Trump, Barack Obama, and a little boy were on a falling airplane. There were 3 parachutes. Donald Trump grabs the first parachute and jumps off the plane saying, “The world needs my leadership!” Barack Obama grabs a parachute and says, “I need to help make choices for our world,” so he jumps off the plane. At this point, the Pope and the little boy are on the plane. The Pope says to the boy, “take the last parachute, I am too old and I’m going to die soon one day.” The little boy says, “actually there are two, you see, Donald Trump took my backpack.”
People claim that Trump has Russian ties.
FAKE NEWS!
All of Trump's ties are made in China.
In order to get $355 million for his civil fraud case, Donald Trump desperately needed to fundraise. So, in every Republican Party event, he will serve the Patriotic Trump Dog! It consists of an 80-year-old sausage inside a 10-year-old cream bun, topped with Russian dressing.
Trump does have the best people, doesn't he?
Why won't Trump be subject to impeachment?
Answer: Because Republicans in Congress insist that every baby be brought to full term!
In Portuguese, "Trumpa" means bullshit.
What do you call an orange on a small stick?
Donald Trump.
What is the difference between Trump and a flying pig? The letter F.
Why does Donald Trump take Xanax?
For Hispanic attacks!
What's the difference between Donald Trump and a dirty diaper?
Answer: none, they're both self-absorbed and full of sh*t!
What did Donald Trump serve Justin Trudeau at the state dinner?
Poutine in traditional Russian dressing!
Once I saw Donald Trump and an orange and couldn’t tell the difference 😂