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Why does Donald Trump take Xanax ?

For hispanic attacks !

How do Mexicans feel about Trump’s wall? – They’ll get over it.

The Pope and Donald Trump are on stage in front of a huge crowd.

The Pope leaned towards Trump and said, “Do you know that with one little wave of my hand I can make every person in this crowd go wild with joy? This joy will not be a momentary display, like that of your followers, but go deep into their hearts and for the rest of their lives whenever they speak of this day, they will rejoice!"

Trump replies, “I seriously doubt that. With one little wave of your hand? Show me!”

So the Pope slapped him.

If Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump are in a boat and it capsizes. Who survives? – America.

Donald Trump wants to ban the sale of pre-shredded cheese. – He wants to make America grate again.

The Pentagon is changing the nuclear codes to over 140 characters, …

so Trump can’t tweet it.

How’s Donald Trump going to get rid of all the Mexicans? – Juan by Juan.

A man goes into heaven and there he meets jesus. He asks Jesus what that broken clock is there for. Jesus says “that is mother teresa’s clock it has never moved because she has never lied”. “There is Abraham Lincolns clock. He has .lied twice so it has moved twice.” “Where is Donald Trump’s?” Ask’s the man. Jesus answers “it is in my office, I am using it as a ceiling fan.”

Trump is going too far.

He deported a printer because it didn’t have papers.

Trump says to Obama “you know it’s the White House not the black house right?” And Obama says “yeah but it isn’t the orange house either.

i bought shoes from a drug dealer yesterday- i dont know what he laced them with but i was trippen all day

Why does Mexico not have a good athletics team? Because anyone who can run or jump is already over the wall.

Donald Trump was golfing with Barack Obama. The Donald said, “Listen Barack, I’m getting older and I’m having trouble sexually satisfying my young wife. I know that you black guys are supposed to be magic in bed. Can you give me a few pointers?” Barack gave Donald a few ideas and that night Donald made love to his wife. He did everything he was told. He started out slowly entering his wife gently then finished hard. Melania came quickly screaming. “Oh Donald, You f... just like Barack Obama.”

The Trump cocktail .Take a large glass + fill it with a ounce of everything behind the bar . Top it with whipped cream and a cherry . Now for the hard part Finding a Mexican to pay for it .

When China built the Great Wall, the Mongols invaded them and founded the Yuan dynasty. With Trump building his wall, will the Mexicans invade the US and found the Juan dynasty?

Why did Trump decide to build the wall?

Because China built a wall and they do not have any mexicans.

I was rooting for Donald trump to be president We havnt had a presidential assassination in a while

Why is it that when Donald Trump and Melania make love she is always on top?

Donald Trump can only F@#k up.

Trump, Must I say more?

Why won’t Trump be subject to impeachment? Answer: Because Republicans in Congress insist that every baby be brought to full term!