Farmer Jokes

Child: *drinking milk*

Farmer: Hey, what are you doing?

Child: Oh, I just milked one of your cows.

Farmer: We don't have any cows, we only have bulls.

Child: *realizes*

Why did the farmer name his pig ink? Because he kept on running out of the pen.

A farmer walks up to his farmer neighbor with a jug of milk. The farmer says, "I milked your cow." The neighbor replies, "I have a bull, not a cow."

How did the farmer find his lost cow? He tractor down

why did the farmer went to the strip club

coz he was looking for his hoe

Little Johnny was walking down a dirt country road, and he came upon a old farmer leaning against a fence looking sad shaking his head. He walked up to the the old farmer and asked him what's wrong. The Old Farmer said, " my mule, he just won't do nothing, he don't work any more, always looking sad, barely eat, just sad." Little Johnny said, "can I go talk him?" "Sure, The Old Farmer said, he's back in the barn." Little Johnny went back in the barn, seen the mule just sad, and sighing.. A few minutes laters, Little Johnny came out and said, "You're mule fixed." The Old Farmer ran in, and seen the mule laughing, just rolling, and crying laughing.. "Thank you, thank you," The Old Farmer said, and Little Johnny was on his way.. Well, a few days later, Little Johnny was walking down the same old dirt road, and came upon The Old Farmer again, looking sad.. "What's the matter?" Little Johnny asked.. "It's my mule again, ever since you talked him he won't do nothing, he won't work, just laughing all day, what did you say?" "Can I go in and talk to him again?" Little Johnny asked. "Sure," said The Old Farmer, "he's back in the barn." Little Johnny went in the barn and a few minutes later came back out. "Your mule fixed sir." The Old Farmer went in seen the mule 'Crying' crying really hard. The Old Farmer came running out of the barn, "Hey boy! What did you say to my mule, one day he's sad, then laughing, now he's crying, just what did you say to my mule?" Little Johnny smiled and answered, "We'll the first time I told him my dick was bigger than his, this time I showed it to him"

What’s the difference between a female farmer and Hitler’s girlfriend? One bails her hay and the other heils her bae.

Little Johnny was late to school one day and miss brown asks, Johnny how come ur late to class and Johnny says, Miss, u wouldn’t believe it, the farmers bull got out and started fucking the white cow miss brown said Johnny don’t use that word next time you want to say that use the word “surprised”. The next day Johnny was late again and miss brown said Johnny why are you late and Johnny replied miss you wouldn’t believe it the farmers bull got out and “surprised” the whit cow, miss brown said that’s much better Jonny and Johnny said yeah walked straight passed it and started fucking the black one

Why did the cow jump over the moon?

Because the farmer had cold hands!

Why don’t cows have any money?

Because farmers milk them dry.

Why couldn’t the dairy farmer find his home ? He lost the whey!😅

What do a pimp and a farmer have in common? They both need a hoe to stay in business

What did the cow say when it saw the farmer twice in one day? -- "Deja moo!"

Hey girl are you a farmer? Because you sure know how to raise a cock

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?

Where's my tractor?

After an unsuccessful harvest, why did the farmer decide to try a career in music? Because he had a ton of sick beets.

Penaldo song 🎵🎵🎵

He has conquered all the Farmers He is never going to stop From Lithuania down to Andorra He has scored a fucking lot Penalties and Tapins The Fields of Faroe Islands He is our GOAT And his name is Cristiano Columbus Allez, Allez, Allez Allez, Allez, Allez