Aed jokes
What is the difference between a plane and a helicopter?
A plane hits a building, but a helicopter hits the floor.
I got arrested for raping a girl. Its so unfair, i really thought she was dead.
What is the tallest building?
A library 📚
It has the most stories.
Q: What does your Mama and a slinky have in common?
A: They aren't much to look at, but you can't help cracking a smile when you see it tumbling down the stairs.
When you run over a speed bump in a school zone and you remember that there are no speed bumps.
How do you keep a homophobic heterosexual man that is a minister and a Christian nationalist with blond hair in suspense?
Wait until Christmas to take away his church's tax-exempt status or he will call the ACLU.
Your family tree looks like a circle 💀💀💀
What category of music did JFK like?
You could say he was a metalhead.
One day, the teacher asks a boy, "Why can't fish talk underwater?"
The kid says, "If I put your head underwater, will you be able to talk?"
Are you a knife? Because damn, I want you inside of me ;)
I got a lot running through my head right now. I wish at least one was a 12-gauge round.
Why can't Michael Jackson go within 500 meters of a school?
Because he's dead.
Don't worry, Stephen Hawking isn't dead.
They have just got to copy and paste his memory onto a USB.
How did Helen Keller’s parents punish her? They handed her a basketball and told her to “read this book”.
I asked my midget neighbor if he wanted a lift. He told me to "Fuck off!!!" I thought, what a cheeky cunt and zipped my backpack up and walked away.
I wanted to see if she was anorexic, so I threw a Funyun at her to see if she'd use it as a hula hoop or inhale it.
Q: If Adolf Hitler was a sea creature, which would he be?
A: Adlof-in.
What's the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer? A hooker can wash her crack and resell it.
A new game the whole family can play...
Incest.
A depressed kid was stuck on a tree, and a man saw the kid.
Man: "Hang in there! I'm gonna get some help!"
Two minutes later, the kid literally did what the guy said.
RIP Daniel Kyre from Cyndago (July 6, 1994-September 18, 2015)
Daniel committed suicide five years ago today......