Woman

Woman jokes

Wikipedia

  • I went to the “lists of women” page on Wikipedia and it was blank.

    Either, Wikipedia is proving women do not exist or John Cena decided to come out as transgender.

  • 1
  • Mum

  • What do you call the woman that fucked sooooooo many hunks to have the condom break and a failure to be born? Ur Mum.

  • 2
  • Strip club

  • A dad and son walk into a strip club. The people in the strip club said he was too young to be in here, so they had to leave. Ten years later, they went back there. They saw a small dancer. The father walked over there and said the woman looked too small to be in here. Her reply was... "I wasn't dancing ten years ago."

  • 4
  • Date

  • There is a man and a woman on a date.

    The woman asked what kind of things do you love?

    The table starts to lift up on the man's side and the man says sorry.

  • 2
  • Privilege

  • Can people please shut up about "male privileges"? There is no right that men have that women don't.

    Women have the right to genital integrity. Women can vote without having to sign up for the draft.

    Women have the right to choose parenthood; men do not.

    Women have the right to be assumed caregivers for children.

    Women have the right to call unwanted, coerced sex rape.

    Women have the right to lower jail sentences for the same crime.

    Women have the right to not be assumed sexual predators.

    Women have the right to government departments that solely serve their interests. They also have the luxury of "women only" events that men cannot even dream of. (They even took the boy scouts away from us.)

    Women have the right to government-enforced gender quotas.

    Women have the right to exclusive tax benefits for being a business owner.

    Women have the right to domestic violence shelters.

    Women have the right to not be assumed the primary aggressor in a domestic dispute.

    Women have the right to rape a man or boy, and if she gets pregnant from that man/boy, they can sue him for child support.

    So it is women who have more rights.

    So shut up, feminists, please.

    Yo mama

  • The Yo Mama song to end all yo mama jokes.

    If you know what song this is parodying, you get a cookie.

    Well, it’s a oooh, yo mama.

    Ohhh, Yo Mama.

    oh wop oh wop...YO MAMA!

    Yo mama so fat, she gotta bathe in Sea World.

    Well, it’s a oooh, yo mama.

    Ohhhh, YO MAMA!

    Oh woo ohhh, YO MAMA!

    Yo mama so slow she took 9 months to get the joke.

    Your own motheeer makes me giggle.

    Her struggling to do taaaasks, see her belly wiggle.

    HEY!

    Yo mama so fat she on both sides o’the family.

    Yo mama so inbred her own fam’ly tree

    Looks like a spider web an’ yo mama so hairy

    I thought it was King Kong I saw, that bitch is scary.

    Yo mama so dumb a kid said “gimme a fag”

    And in response she kidnapped Ricardo in a giant bag.

    Yo mama so blind, she drove through puppies in a blunder

    I swear I almost thought the driver was Stevie Wonder.

    Yo mama so old, she’s nostalgic for the big bang.

    Drier than Sahara, that crusty old thang.

    Well, it’s a oooh, yo mama.

    Ohhh, Yo Mama.

    oh wop oh wop...YO MAMA!

    Yo Mama so fat her picture still printing out.

    Well, it’s a oooh, yo mama.

    Ohhhh, YO MAMA!

    Oh woo ohhh, YO MAMA!

    Yo mama so ugly I thought you had two dads.

    MMMMMMM

    ahhhhhh

    ohhhohoh

    Your own motheeer, your own motheeeeer’s pussy is tight.

    It’s not too dryyy or weeet it’s just right.

    Hey Mama!

    I fucked her so hard, the bitch done passed out

    but not before I creamed all over her and shout

    “I’M FUCKING THESE MOMS ALL THE WAY TO HEAVEN!

    Don’t care if she’s 20 or 77!

    I’m doing all the moms all over the worl’

    Even if they weren’t ‘riginally born a girl.

    A pussy’s a pussy no matter who its from

    Don’t care if that woman is smart or dumb!”

    That’s the truth there, baby! Even if

    yo mama too stupid to tell apart her own kid

    or if she’s so fugly, she’s the reason why

    Helen Keller, poor soul, went deaf and blind.

    I want to fuck every MILF on Earth

    it don’t matter how much her ass is worth

    or if she’s so poor, coal on Christmas is a treasure

    Would I fuck her anyway? It would be my pleasure.

    My body count so high can’t nobody top me

    She said, “I’ll call you Freddie Mercury cause I want you to rock me.”

    I said, “aiight bet! Can’t nobody stop me!”

    Well, it’s a oooh, yo mama.

    Ohhh, Yo Mama.

    oh wop oh wop...YO MAMA!

    But yo mama still so poor Africans donate to her!

  • 1