Wear jokes
Why did the kid cross the road?
Because he wasn't wearing his seat belt! 😂
Yo mama so fat, when she was wearing black by a bank which was getting robbed, they thought, "AHH SWAT!"
Why does Sonic wear gloves? Because his hands are cold.
What does Sonic wear when he goes to the beach? A speedo.
Q: Why can emos wear dog collars at school, but people can't wear hats? WTF school!
wear sweatpants.
A small boy went up to a dog fountain? The more you. HAHA gorgeous ddollars of benjamin frnakus wghen hes wearing beakini bea at the beach hahaha.
Me: Mom, can I have some makeup?
Mom: No. You are beautiful just the way you are.
Me: So that’s why you wear makeup?
My friend is upset with me because I sniffed his grandmother's nickers. Not sure if it was because she was still wearing them or if it was because the whole family was watching. Either way, the rest of her funeral was really awkward.
If wishes were horses, Beggars would ride.
If turnips were watches, I would wear one by my side.
And if if's and an's were pots and pans, The tinker would never work!
What does a house wear? Address.
I don't really trust the press. Sometimes they wear badges that say "press," but if you press those badges, they just fall over, all surprised.
What do you call a chair with a hat?
I don't know; the real question is, why was the chair wearing a hat?
What's the funniest thing about being ringside at a UFC fight?
When you look around and all of the spectators are wearing white gowns and fuzzy socks, and you realize you aren't at a UFC event, you're watching your fellow patients fight to the death at a psychiatric facility.
What did the mermaid wear for math class?
Algaebra.
When your girlfriend picks you up and decides to prank you by not wearing pants to a seafood restaurant.
Did you get seafood without me?
Ted Bundy walks into a bar wearing all black. The bartender asks, “Whose funeral is it?”
Ted Bundy looks around the room and replies, “I haven’t decided yet.”
You're so fat, when you wear a yellow raincoat, people call out, "TAXI!"
Why did the rapper wear a watch to the studio?
He wanted to make TIMELESS TRACKS.
When you ask for plastic surgery, they said, "We could not fix you, but the only way is to wear a mask to fix your ugly face."
Why did Princess Diana cross the road?
'Cause she didn't wear a seatbelt.