Wear jokes

If Trump colored his hair green and wore an orange shirt and pants, I will call him a carrot.

Women be like don't tell me what to wear, proceeds to tell men what to wear.

Don't tell me I haven't got balls. I just happen to wear mine on my chest, and I can guarantee they're a lot bigger than yours!

I'm back and wearing dead whites who are killing whites from Eastern Europe on me. Shout out my boy russia and Ukraine, they all are evil just like USA and China and the rest of the west!

I saw someone who was about to jump off a bridge. They were wearing a Nike "JUST DO IT" shirt.

Why don’t women wear mini skirts in the winter?

Because they’ll get chapped lips.

Why don’t midgets wear tampons?

Because they’ll trip over the string.

Yo mama so ugly,

they won’t give her a vaccine so she can keep wearing her mask.

Why should you always wear rubber?

So you don’t leave DNA evidence.

What kind of clothing should you wear on “hump day”? Camelflouge.

Why did the teacher wear sunglasses?

Because her students were so bright!

I saw two guys wearing matching clothing, and I asked if they were gay. They quickly arrested me.

What is the weirdest thing to wear and what is the weirdest thing to say?

Weirdest thing to ware: Socks with sandals, also with flip flops!

Weirdest thing to say: "Would you rather be a bath or a toilet?" "The blue angel sea slug looks like an alien." (weird).

Bonus: Things to ware with other things: Crop top with t-shirt (really hip), Crop top with tights or shorts, dresses with tights! (Cool) Oh well byeeeeeee!

Why do eight-year-old girls wear panties with flowers on?

In loving memory of all the faces that were buried in there.

I saw a kid wearing tatty rags on a curb, so I asked, "Are you an orphan?"

"Yes," he replied. "What gave me away?" He asked, "Your parents," I said.

What did Cinderella wear to the beach?

Glass flippers.

My friend’s neighbor’s house is a real pigsty. There are hogs everywhere wearing neck garments.

Boyfriend: "Babe, are you traffic police?"

Girlfriend: "No."

Boyfriend: "Then why do you shout at me for not wearing a helmet?"

Stupid Mary Jane was swinging on the swing.

Her momma said, "Stupid Mary Jane, don't swing so high, the boys will see your underwear!"

Stupid Mary Jane laughed and laughed. She knew she wasn't wearing no underwear.

Question: Why does my teenage brother wear a cape to bed?

Answer: Because he can't sleep in his race car bed...