Wear jokes

Why don’t midgets wear tampons?

Because they’ll trip over the string.

I saw someone who was about to jump off a bridge. They were wearing a Nike "JUST DO IT" shirt.

Why should you always wear rubber?

So you don’t leave DNA evidence.

Yo mama so ugly,

they won’t give her a vaccine so she can keep wearing her mask.

Women be like don't tell me what to wear, proceeds to tell men what to wear.

I'm back and wearing dead whites who are killing whites from Eastern Europe on me. Shout out my boy russia and Ukraine, they all are evil just like USA and China and the rest of the west!

Don't tell me I haven't got balls. I just happen to wear mine on my chest, and I can guarantee they're a lot bigger than yours!

What kind of clothing should you wear on “hump day”? Camelflouge.

Why did the teacher wear sunglasses?

Because her students were so bright!

Why don’t women wear mini skirts in the winter?

Because they’ll get chapped lips.

What is the weirdest thing to wear and what is the weirdest thing to say?

Weirdest thing to ware: Socks with sandals, also with flip flops!

Weirdest thing to say: "Would you rather be a bath or a toilet?" "The blue angel sea slug looks like an alien." (weird).

Bonus: Things to ware with other things: Crop top with t-shirt (really hip), Crop top with tights or shorts, dresses with tights! (Cool) Oh well byeeeeeee!

Why do eight-year-old girls wear panties with flowers on?

In loving memory of all the faces that were buried in there.

I saw a kid wearing tatty rags on a curb, so I asked, "Are you an orphan?"

"Yes," he replied. "What gave me away?" He asked, "Your parents," I said.

What did Cinderella wear to the beach?

Glass flippers.

Why did the rapper wear sunglasses to the concert?

Because his lyrics were so fire, he needed protection!

Why do you Scotchmen wear kilts?

Because sheep can hear a zipper from a mile away.

When your girlfriend picks you up and decides to prank you by not wearing pants to a seafood restaurant.

Did you get seafood without me?

Ted Bundy walks into a bar wearing all black. The bartender asks, “Whose funeral is it?”

Ted Bundy looks around the room and replies, “I haven’t decided yet.”

You're so fat, when you wear a yellow raincoat, people call out, "TAXI!"

Why does Sonic wear gloves? Because his hands are cold.