Press

Press Jokes

I don't really trust the press. Sometimes they wear badges that say 'press', but if you press those badges they just fall over all surprised.

So there is this button there's a 50% chance you get a million dollars there's a 50% chance that you turn into a turtle make them press the button and if they give the money you just push the orphan over take their money and run away because who they going to tell their parents.

I got a orphan a Iphone 6 I told him to press the home button he has been doing it all day

I was on an orphans website, but I pressed on his profile and realized he had no home page

Despite Michael Jackson’s legal problems while we was alive, McDonald’s is still going to honor his life achievements in the music industry by naming a sandwich after him.

They’re going to call it the McMichael! It’s going to be a fifty year old piece of meat pressed between two eight year old buns.

7

Mr.Smith lived in an apartment. in the apartment, he went to the elevator and went to the 16th floor then he went to the 21st floor by 5 stairs every morning. why did he do that?

because he was too short!! so he pressed the highest button he could and went to his apartment

What did the 1.8 nanosecond old baby get for his birthday?

Nailed to a puppy falling on a buzz saw being crushed in a hydraulic press while being set on fire.