Press jokes
How much context, pecker? You Press context categoria, go Discord.
Drink tea with friend game night.
Did you know that Stephen Hawking's death was an accident because he pressed "shut down" instead of "sleep mode?"
Stephen Hawking's death was completely accidental.
He pressed "shut down" instead of "sleep".
The media's relationship with Hillary is just like Bill's relationship with Hillary. The relationship is unwanted and forced, and they'll move on to the next person any chance they get.
Danny just bought a new game from Steam for a penny.
About one hour later, Danny asks his mother: "Mom, I am not able to start the game."
Mom asked, "Why?"
Danny answers: "It says 'Press any key' on the screen, but I can't find an 'Any' button on my keyboard."
If your wife dies of childbirth, can you press charges on the baby?
Press F to pay respects to Grumpy Cat!
FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF
I was using my computer one time and I pressed Ctrl-Alt-Delete, and Stephen Hawking went into a deep sleep.
Stephen Hawking's death was simply an accident. He pressed power off instead of sleep mode.
Why is drinking soda so sad?
It's soda-pressing.
"Rajesh get on bus, so many people, squeeze here squeeze there. He daydream about naughty stuff, like coffee spill but not coffee. Bus move, stop, he press close to pretty lady, she smell nice. Rajesh think how funny if something else spill, make whole bus ride wild." He laugh to self, bus ride never boring now!
Why did Stephen Hawking die? ... Because he pressed "shut down" instead of "sleep."
Have you heard about my new can crushing job?
It's soda-pressing.
Why can't 12 boys go down the elevator? Because they have nothing to press the buttons.
Q: What do you call a sad soda?
A: Soda-pressing.
How do you make Indians explode? Press the red button.
Why did he die?
Because God made a mistake and pressed Ctrl+Z.
I hate my job—all I do is crush cans all day. It’s soda pressing.
What's a cow's favorite newspaper?
The Daily M0Os.
Oh my frickig god, cleared my history and forgot my password for this, 3th account!
I don't really trust the press. Sometimes they wear badges that say "press," but if you press those badges, they just fall over, all surprised.