How do you embarrass an archaeologist? You give him a tampon and ask what period it's from.
A vampire walks into a bar and orders a cup of hot water. The bartender asks, "I thought you guys only drink blood?"
The vampire pulls out a used tampon and says, "I'm making tea."
Why do tampons have strings? So you can floss your teeth when you’re done eating.
Bro, tampons look like sperms, and they go up your coochie.
Why don't midgets use tampons?
Answer: They are always tripping over the string.
Three vampires walk into a bar. The first one orders a Bloody Mary. The second orders a Bloody Mary. The bartender turns to the third and asks, “A Bloody Mary?”
The vampire shakes his head. “Hot water for me.”
“Hot water?”
“I found a tampon out back and want to make tea.”
What do tampons and your sister have in common?
My girlfriend told me the dishwasher was leaking, so I brought home some tampons.
How do you know when a woman is going to have a black baby?
When she takes the tampon out, all the cotton is picked.
I don’t see what the problem is.
The Supreme Court came up with a solution to the tampon shortage, yet all the liberals are pissed!
Q: There were two tampons walking down the road the other day. Guess what they said to each other?
A: Nothing, 'cause they're both stuck-up cunts.
How did you get into the tampon 100?
Pull some strings!
Yo mama so big, she thought Christopher Rhoades was a tampon.
Why do female parachutists have to wear tampons before they jump?
So they don't whistle on the way down!
You know why women wear tampons so the crabs could bungee jump
What did one tampon say to the other tampon?
Nothing, they were both stuck up bitches!
A black lady goes inside the drug store and asks the pharmacist, "Do you carry tampons?" Then the pharmacist asks the black lady, "Do you want the mini pads or the maxi pads?"
And then the black lady asks the pharmacist, "What is the difference?"
And then the pharmacist asks the black lady, "What is your flow like?"
And then the black lady tells the pharmacist, "Linoleum."
This morning I was having a conversation with my ex boyfriend about reincarnation I said to him if you could come back in the next life as anything what would you come back as and he thought about it for a minute and says a tree that way everybody can look at me and admire me. Then he says the same thing to me I started thinking about it when these two sexy half naked studs walked by one was a jock the other on his bicycle I know I said I want to come back as a jockstrap or a bicycle seat but knowing my luck I'll come back as a tampon
What do feminists and tampons have in common?
They're both stuck-up cunts.
Yo mama's so fat, she used a telephone pole as a tampon.
