Vision jokes
What do you call a deer with good eyes?
Good ideas.
"Don’t look! I saw you peeking through the window."
My friend has glasses, and we were talking about owls, and I told my friend to give an owl glasses. I told my friend that it'd be a spectacled owl!
Nope, should've gone to Specsavers.
I see 6 letters in "the past."
I have 2020 vision.
I see 7 letters in "the future," I have 2021 vision.
Memes
Why couldn’t the house see?
The blinds were down.
Why are Chinese so good at jaywalking? Cause they can't tell the difference between green and red light with their tiny eyes.
Why did the old man fall down a well?
He couldn't see that well.
I gave my blind friend a cheese grater for his birthday.
Make him read a book.
Two blondes fell down a hole.
One said, "It's dark in here, isn't it?"
The other replied, "I don't know; I can't see."
What problems might a blind child run into?
A wall.
I think I would like a job cleaning mirrors. It's just something I could really see myself doing.
Why doesn't Batman have super vision?
His parents died.
Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it looked in the mirror.
Why did the blind man fall into the well?
He couldn’t see that well.
If you need to squint to read this...
You probably need glasses.
Why does Trump "not" wear glasses? Because he's got 20/20 vision!
Damn! Really stole my friend's glasses. Well, now they're blind, but not really, they're dead.
What do you call a deer with no eyes? No eyed deer.
What do u call a deer with no eyes or legs? Still no eyed deer.
What do u call a deer with no eyes, no legs and no balls? Still no f*#$in eyed deer.