Blind jokes
What do you call a blind dinosaur? Do-you-think-he-saurus.
I have just started a sexual relationship with a blind woman. It's very rewarding, but quite challenging.
Took me ages to get her husband's voice right.
A blind man walks into a bar, and a table, and a door, and a staircase.
How do you find a blind man at a nude beach?
It isn't hard.
What do blind kids and orphans have in common? Neither of them can see their parents.
A blind woman tells her boyfriend that she’s seeing someone.
It’s either really terrible news or really great news.
How do you surprise a blind guy? Leave the plunger in the toilet.
Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new piano?
Neither has he.
I donated 100 dollars to a blind children’s charity. Too bad they won’t ever see a dime of it.
I bought my blind friend a cheese grater for his birthday. A week later, he told me it was the most violent book he ever read.
Why can't blind people eat fish?
Because it's sea food.
Stop with the blind jokes... I don't see the point.
Kid asks, "What is dark humor?" Me *points*, "See that guy across the street..." Kid: "I can't... I'm blind." Me: "Exactly."
Why was Helen Keller's belly button bruised?
Her boyfriend was blind too.
In my spare time I help blind children. -- I mean the verb, not the adjective.
This is really mean...
A man put a blind man in a circular room and said, "Your dinner's in the corner."
Son: Mom, what is dark humor?
Mom: Son, do you see that man trying to tie his shoe with no hands?
Son: Mother, you know I'm blind and can't see!!
Mom: Exactly!
What did the mute man tell the blind man?
Nothing.
Me: Happy birthday! I got you a Rubix cube! Friend: I hate you. Me: Why? Friend: I'm color blind.
At the funeral of a family friend, I was chatting to June, an elderly lady I hadn’t seen since I was a teenager. I was thrilled when she told me what a beautiful young woman I’d become.
On the journey home, I remarked to my mother how lovely it had been to see June again.
“Yes, it’s such a shame that she’s gone blind,” she said sadly.