Violence jokes
My teacher got so mad at me for making 9/11 jokes, she hit me twice and I said, "Damn, got hit twice!"
What's worse than a dead baby?
A pile of dead babies.
What's worse than that?
One's alive at the bottom.
What's even worse than THAT?
It eats it's way out.
Wait it gets worse...
It goes back for seconds.
Just one more I swear...
It fucks one of it's siblings at the bottom.
Suicide really isn't something to joke about, unless it's hanging yourself.
It's a really quicker way to die, and less blood spilled for your mother to clean up.
How to make white ice cream red... blend a baby into it!
What a school shooter's favorite song?
"Pumped Up Kicks."
Memes
found this on google
A man walks into a bar, and there is a line of people waiting to punch him.
Yeah, that was the punchline.
So, as a school shooter, I try to remember my ABC's. A, B, C, D, E, F, GUN!
And I basically stop at G, since no students ever speak to me about the rest.
What do you call a kid with special needs with a gun? Special Forces.
What bounces up and down at 100mph?
A baby tied to the back of a truck.
My wife asked me to connect more on my feminine side. So I crashed our car and fucked my trainer.
I beat up a deaf kid the other day. I had to. He kept throwing up gang signs.
What do you call a terrorist in a wheelchair?
An RC-XD.
If a homeschooled kid shoots his parents, does that count as a school shooting?
There's this smart way to sneak a calculator into school. I've heard of it. You take the calculator, put it in a gun magazine, put the magazine in the gun, and bring the gun to school!
When you're sad, hit an orphan.
What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
Jace: Haha, I won, dude. You suck at Monopoly!
Timmy: Let's play another game. *GUNSHOT* I guess I won!
Jace: *SCREAMS IN PAIN*
Timmy: What? I thought we were playing Chutes and Ladders!
What's red all over and spins at 100 mps?
Baby in a blender.
What's worse than ten babies stapled to a tree?
A baby stapled to ten trees.
What do you call a suicide bomber in a wheelchair?
An RC-XD.
Who would win in a fight, in a boxing ring? Mike Tyson or Helen Keller with a Tommy gun?
Mike Tyson. Helen Keller never heard the bell.