Violence jokes
What’s the difference between a suicide bomber and a feminist? A suicide bomber actually does something when triggered.
Gently throw a baby off a ten story building!
What is red, white, and blue and makes me proud to live in this country?
The baby in the corner I choked, stabbed, and then came on.
VOTING SEMIFINAL 2
LIKE: When the school shooter throws a smoke grenade into the classroom and the autistic kid thinks it’s a Disco party. 🕺🕺🕺
DISLIKE: When you’re playing dead and the school shooter starts unbuckling his belt and you hear him say “This boy always had a fat ass”.
Vote for the better joke.
It’s all fun and games at “take your kid to work day” until you realize your dad is a suicide bomber.
A lady runs into a police station and yells, "Help, help! I've been graped!"
A police officer says, "Do you mean raped?"
The girl then replies, "No, there was a bunch of 'em!"
Making fun of someone you're angry with is childish. Be an adult and hit them with your car <3
What do you say to a woman with two black eyes?
Nothing, you've told her twice.
If you kill an orphan, would that count as a squad wipe?
What leaves a bigger memory than a passionate kiss?
A stab wound.
God bless the shooting that happened.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Stranger.
Stranger who?
Stranger, why are you in my house masticating my apparent dead wife?
No means no, but if you use chloroform, it’s a guaranteed yes.
Roses or daisies? Now I know what flowers to put on your casket when I murder that pussy.
I ran over three disabled kids.
"Cripple kill."
Where did Suzy go during the bombing?
Everywhere.
It's only rape.
If she finds out.
A farmer told me that he wanted a couple of acres, so I punched him in the teeth.
What's the difference between 13 dead babies and a skeleton?
There aren't any, there's 13 skeletons in my closet.
A man walks into a bar with a 44. Magnum and yells, "Who the fuck fucked my wife?" The bartender answers, "Mate, you ain't got enough bullets."