Violence jokes

When you're in the middle of a test and you hear gun shots.

What do you call a suicide bomber in a wheelchair?

An RC-XD.

I was walking down the street one day, and I passed the gun store. I walked in, and everything was half off. I didn't know back-to-school sales had started already!

Q: Why are school shooting jokes funny?

A: Because they're intended for a young audience.

Why do people who get shot in the head always become therapists?

They are more open-minded.

Even people who are good for nothing can bring a smile to your face.

For instance, when you push them down the stairs.

What is the difference between a broom and a mop?

It’s hard to beat my girlfriend when she’s holding the mop.

What do you do to a deaf girl after you’re done fucking her?

Break her fingers so she can’t tell anyone.

If I ever find the doctor who screwed up my limb replacement surgery... I’ll kill him with my bear hands.

"A llahu Aks into a bar..."

And it blows up!

If you're bored, punch an orphan. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?

I walked into a supermarket to get some ordinary clothes for the wife. Then I realized I was in a rape museum.

So, if Russia was the motherland and Germany was the fatherland, what does that mean?

The Western Front is domestic violence.

They laughed at my drawing, so I laughed at their chalk outline.

What are the similarities of GTA V and 9/11? A plane can be stolen and crashed into a building by a bunch of terrorists.

When the person who killed JFK heard "headshot."

Do you want to know my motto when I’m bored?

Punch an orphan, who is he going to tell, his mom?

You can't lose Kahoot if you "kashoot" the class first.

What's worse than ten babies stapled to a tree?

A baby stapled to ten trees.

Jace: Haha, I won, dude. You suck at Monopoly!

Timmy: Let's play another game. *GUNSHOT* I guess I won!

Jace: *SCREAMS IN PAIN*

Timmy: What? I thought we were playing Chutes and Ladders!