Violence jokes
Do you want to know my motto when I’m bored?
Punch an orphan, who is he going to tell, his mom?
If you're bored, punch an orphan. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
Even people who are good for nothing can bring a smile to your face.
For instance, when you push them down the stairs.
If I ever find the doctor who screwed up my limb replacement surgery... I’ll kill him with my bear hands.
What is the difference between a broom and a mop?
It’s hard to beat my girlfriend when she’s holding the mop.
What do you do to a deaf girl after you’re done fucking her?
Break her fingers so she can’t tell anyone.
Turn the comments into a school shootout ;)
How to make white ice cream red... blend a baby into it!
Why did the school shooter earn extra points?
Because he was on a kill streak.
Clap em sis!
My teacher got so mad at me for making 9/11 jokes, she hit me twice and I said, "Damn, got hit twice!"
What bounces up and down at 100mph?
A baby tied to the back of a truck.
I beat up a deaf kid the other day. I had to. He kept throwing up gang signs.
A man walks into a bar, and there is a line of people waiting to punch him.
Yeah, that was the punchline.
So, as a school shooter, I try to remember my ABC's. A, B, C, D, E, F, GUN!
And I basically stop at G, since no students ever speak to me about the rest.
What do you call a kid with special needs with a gun? Special Forces.
My wife asked me to connect more on my feminine side. So I crashed our car and fucked my trainer.
If a homeschooled kid shoots his parents, does that count as a school shooting?
My therapist told me time heals all wounds, so I stabbed him. Now we wait.
What do you call a terrorist in a wheelchair?
An RC-XD.