Violence jokes

Chuck Norris threw a grenade and killed 20 people, then it exploded.

What did Chris Brown say when he saw Rihanna?

"I'd hit that."

I saw some kids bullying a kid in a wheelchair. I grabbed the kid, pushed him down the stairs, and said, "GTA physics."

Science experts say when you get mad, punch an orphan. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?

There once was a man who beat his wife, And before he even knew it, he ended her life. His hands were a mess, all red and bloody, He had to find somewhere to hide the body.

Why did the suicide bomber get promoted?

Because he was blowing up at work. 💀😈

Gently throw a baby off a ten story building!

Man 1: Knock knock.

Man 2: Who's there?

Man 1: Ice.

Man 2: Ice who?

Man 1: I crushed your head.

They say that "The way to a man's heart is through his stomach," but I find it a lot easier to go through the ribcage.

"Dinosaur killing with a 2x4, no more purple dinosaur!"

I set a gay person on fire. We now call him LGBBQ.

One time I was playing a bongo at a Chinese restaurant.

But they were competing against a Cuban restaurant and killed me.

X is for X-treme shooting!

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What do you do when an orphan gets you mad?

A stab to the neck and a bullet to the face.

"Ahoy, Spongebob! I just committed homicide in Syria, and the one-party state is after my fucking ass! Argagagagagaga!"

DONE🔫

A big guy told the small guy, "Do you want a little pill because you look ill, or should I smash you?"

Boy: "Why can't you get a family?"

Me: "Why can't you get a rope?"

Boy: "What do you mean?"

Friend and me: "We can show you."

Me: "I will tie the rope."

Friend: "I will push the chair."

The hardest part of picking up a hitch hiker is tying them up.

When you let the school shooter borrow your pen so he doesn't kill you.