Mop jokes

Yo mama so stupid, she tried to take Snoop Dogg for a walk.

Yo mama so stupid, she tried to put Vin Diesel in her gas tank.

Yo mama so stupid, she tried to mop the floor with Taylor Swift.

Yo mama so stupid, she tried to ring Kristen Bell.

Yo mama so stupid, she tried to skim Dwayne Johnson across a lake.

A skeleton walks into a bar. Orders a beer and a mop.

Today I told my sis, "Knock knock."

She said, "Who's there?"

I said, "I Eat eat my mop."

She said, "I eat mop poo instead of who."

What did the floor say to the ceiling?

"I look up to you."

What is the difference between a broom and a mop?

It’s hard to beat my girlfriend when she’s holding the mop.

A team of cops and a news reporter are at a home where a violent crime has been committed. The head news reporter, in front of the camera, says, "A woman in this house has killed her husband because he stepped on the floor while she was mopping." He then turns around and asks a cop, "Has the woman been arrested yet?" The cop replies, "Not yet, we're waiting for the floor to dry."

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Smell mop.

Smell mop who?

What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?

"SUPPLIES!"

Me: Knock knock.

My sister: Who's there?

Me: I eat mop.

My sister: I eat mop who?

My mind: I eat my poo.

My sister getting it.

I'd mop the floor with your face, but you might just mess it up more.

"Mommy, mommy! Are we janitors?"

"Shut up and pass me the mop."

What did the janitor think when he was mopping the 101st floor?

The 102nd.

I've seen more charisma in a wet mop than in BLESSEDBRIAN'S personality.

Why did the mop lick the floor of the bathroom? Because it was so poopy.

Knock knock. Who's there? Ieatmop. I eat mop who? Eww, you eat your poo?

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

I eat mop.

A-I eat mop who?

How does a rapper clean his house?

With a LIL' SCRUB.

When you realize you forgot to mop your room, you hear footsteps.

I cleaned my room today. While sweeping under the bed, I heard my mop collide with something. To my surprise, I found Pristiano Penaldo hiding under my bed! My dad said, “Don’t bother sweeping him son, he’s been dusted for years.” I was shocked but not surprised.

Average Kid: brings mp3 to school.

Rich Kid: Brings mp4 to school.

Quiet Kid: Brings an mp5.

A boy walks in on his mother riding his father. "What are you doing?" the boy asks his mother. "I'm jumping on daddy to make him thin," said the mother. "Don't bother," said the boy, "when you go shopping, the lady next door comes and blows him up again."

What do vacuums and your mom have in common?

They both suck.

Elmo, stop penetrating the orphan!

What does Michael Jackson and Chef from South Park have in common?

They both say "Hello children!"