Violence jokes

What's the best part about beating up an orphan?

They can't tell their parents.

They laughed at my crayon drawing.

So I laughed at their chalk outline.

My therapist said, "Time heals all wounds," so I cut her.

Bored? Run over an orphan with your car! What are they going to do, tell their nonexistent parents?

You can tell if a woman is angry if she is holding a gun.

Kid: Hey, Mum, why are we pushing the car off the cliff?

Mum: Shut up, son, you’ll wake your father!

DONE🔫

"Hola, soy Dora. Do you see the cliff? Say, "backpack." Tell her that we need Amanda. While I push her off the cliff, you will not peek. Did you just peek? Close your eyes, you silly goose." The end.

I set a gay person on fire. We now call him LGBBQ.

"This is the dude who assassinated JFK."

"If you got a question, just shoot!"

There once was a man who beat his wife, And before he even knew it, he ended her life. His hands were a mess, all red and bloody, He had to find somewhere to hide the body.

Sonic says if you're bored, punch an orphan. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?

Your hairline got pulled back. You look like you've been climbing Chris, and you got smacked up by Will Smith.

"Dinosaur killing with a 2x4, no more purple dinosaur!"

What does it mean when there is a man in your bed, gasping for breath and saying your name?

It just means that you didn't hold the pillow down long enough.

Why did the suicide bomber get promoted?

Because he was blowing up at work. 💀😈

"I will kill you with knife and gun, get ready, Explain Bear, stupid f***."

When a redhead commits a mass shooting, does the headline read, "Ginger snaps"?

What's the difference between a cop and a bullet?

When a bullet kills somebody, you know it's been fired.

My therapist said I have trouble letting go of the past. So I killed him.