I hate these double standards.
If you burn a body at a crematorium you're "doing a good job". If you do it at home you're "destroying evidence".
What's the difference between puppies and orphans?
The puppies actually get adopted.
Why are so many Americans stupid? Because they shoot the ones that go to school.
What's the hardest part about being a pedophile?
Fitting in.
Why is it that when women decide to kill an unborn baby, it's a "CHOICE," but when I decide to drive my F-150 into a playground full of kids, it's called "MURDER"!
What is the difference between climate change and the greenhouse effect, once a philosopher, twice a sodomite?
Communist jokes aren't funny unless everyone gets them.
Everything is so racist these days, you can't even say "black paint" anymore. You now have to say "Tyrone can you please paint that wall?"
A lot of people claim that white privilege does not exist. Well, how the hell do you explain Michael Jackson not being charged for raping children, despite ample evidence?
Why was the orphan walking through the neighborhood? I don't know, either. It's not like he has a home to go to.
You shouldnβt bully fat people.
They already have enough on their plate.
What do you call a smart person in America?
A tourist.
What do you call a blind racist?
A not see.
Russian history in 5 words: "And then things got worse."
I have many jokes about unemployed people, but sadly, none of them seemed to have worked.
Ancestry.com is spelled with an βIβ in Alabama.
Whatβs a cannibal's favorite takeaway shop?
The orphanage.
Genders are like the twin towers. There used to be two, but now it's just a sensitive subject.
Whatβs the difference between criminals and orphans?
Only one is wanted.
I got kicked out of the school library for placing a women's rights book in the fiction section.
