School Shooting Jokes

What do you call a school shooting survivor who grows up to be a prostitute on the West Coast?

A Sandy Hooker

Where is the cheapest gun range? Your local public school.

How are school shooting victims and school shooting jokes similar?

They never get old.

I was at a funeral for some kids in a school shooting. I don't understand why everyone was so sad, so I asked a lady, "what's so sad?" and she said "What do you think was running through these kid's heads before they died?" I replied "probably a bullet". She gasped and said "do you have any idea how insensitive that is? What do you think is running through their parent's heads?" I said "probably all the money they're losing from this funeral."

My friend was a victim of a school shooting once, but he couldn't tell if they were in the library because of the suppressor on his AR.

Warning, this is dark.

How do you knock out 26 kids in one punch? Give 'em a Sandy Hook.

I never get school shooting jokes.

Maybe they're aimed at a younger audience.

A class is being taught when Bill Clinton walks in. He asks the class, "What is a tragedy?"

One kid, named Jim, raises his hand and says, "If my family and I got ran over by a truck, that would be a tragedy." Bill Clinton replies, "That would be an accident, not a tragedy."

A couple of seconds later, Audrey raises her hand and says, "If a school shooting would happen and 10 kids died, that would be a tragedy." Bill Clinton replies once again with: "That would be a great loss, not a tragedy." All of the kids are confused now when all of a sudden Matthew says, "If you and Hillary Clinton were on an airplane and it got blown up, that would be a tragedy!"

"Yes!" Says Bill Clinton "How do you know?" Matthew says happily, "It is definitely not an accident, and certainly not a great loss!"

I usually don’t make school shooting jokes.

Because they’re aimed at a younger audience.

If you shoot at a school of fish, could you call it a school shooting?

I went to my local shooting range today but was surprised when I saw on the news that there was a school shooting in my shooting range. I don't know who snitched...

*School shooting happens*

Foreign exchange student: *Sobbing under desk*

American student: "First time?"

Want to know why parents don't get school shooting jokes?

Because they are aimed at a younger audience.

I went to the shooting range the other day. After a while, I realized I was the only one there. So, I decided to go home and saw on the news that there was a mass school shooting and there were reporters on the scene. Man, I knew I should have stayed around a little longer.

Teachers at a school shooting be like: damn it. That's the third one this week and it's only Monday.

I was in a school shooting a few years ago, 3 people died.

I guess that’s what you get when you’re bad at hide and seek.

Those poor kids at Sandy Hook, all they wanted was books. Instead, they got magazines.

Two boys are talking on the bus.

Boy 1: I feel like I'm forgetting something.

Boy 2: Hey, did you hear about that school shooting last week?

Boy 1: Oh, that's right.

What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?

Special forces.

Why are school shooting jokes so funny?

Answer: The bullets hit your funny bone!