School shooting jokes

What do you call a school shooting survivor who grows up to be a prostitute on the West Coast?

A Sandy Hooker

I was in a school shooting a few years ago, 3 people died.

I guess that’s what you get when you’re bad at hide and seek.

I usually don’t make school shooting jokes.

Because they’re aimed at a younger audience.

*School shooting happens*

Foreign exchange student: *Sobbing under desk*

American student: "First time?"

My friend was a victim of a school shooting once, but he couldn't tell if they were in the library because of the suppressor on his AR.

Teachers: Whenever there’s a school shooting, hide under the desk.

Students: Hiding under desk.

Shooter: Well, no one’s in here!

One of the students reported a school shooting.

That fucking snitch...

You call it a school shooting.

I call it an unfair shootout.

Where is the cheapest gun range? Your local public school.

I went to the shooting range the other day. After a while, I realized I was the only one there. So, I decided to go home and saw on the news that there was a mass school shooting and there were reporters on the scene. Man, I knew I should have stayed around a little longer.

I was at a funeral for some kids in a school shooting. I don't understand why everyone was so sad, so I asked a lady, "what's so sad?" and she said "What do you think was running through these kid's heads before they died?" I replied "probably a bullet". She gasped and said "do you have any idea how insensitive that is? What do you think is running through their parent's heads?" I said "probably all the money they're losing from this funeral."

A class is being taught when Bill Clinton walks in. He asks the class, "What is a tragedy?"

One kid, named Jim, raises his hand and says, "If my family and I got ran over by a truck, that would be a tragedy." Bill Clinton replies, "That would be an accident, not a tragedy."

A couple of seconds later, Audrey raises her hand and says, "If a school shooting would happen and 10 kids died, that would be a tragedy." Bill Clinton replies once again with: "That would be a great loss, not a tragedy." All of the kids are confused now when all of a sudden Matthew says, "If you and Hillary Clinton were on an airplane and it got blown up, that would be a tragedy!"

"Yes!" Says Bill Clinton "How do you know?" Matthew says happily, "It is definitely not an accident, and certainly not a great loss!"

How do you start a school shooting at a black school?

Call the cops.

What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?

Special forces.

Warning, this is dark.

How do you knock out 26 kids in one punch? Give 'em a Sandy Hook.

How are school shooting victims and school shooting jokes similar?

They never get old.

What do you think is going through kids' heads during school shootings? Bullets.

In case there's a school shooting, the teachers can help out and shoot the kids.

Want to know why parents don't get school shooting jokes?

Because they are aimed at a younger audience.

I'm in school shooting. #USA