Violence jokes
How do you fit a baby in a glass?
A blender.
How do you get it out?
Explosives!
What do 100,000 battered women have in common? The bitch was wrong!
Whenever I’m bored, I hit up my local orphanage and beat some of them up.
I mean honestly, what are they going to do, tell their parents? 😂😂
How do you make a cat sound like a dog?
You set it on fire; then it goes, "WOOF!"
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
How hard can you throw them!
What’s the difference between a cat and a dog?
It’s easier to throw a cat against the wall.
How many dead babies does it take to paint my room?
It depends how many bullets you have.
How long does it take for 10 dead babies to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.
How do you rape a girl?
By doing a tornado kick to your head since you stupid kids like rape jokes!
Why did Sally die? She got stabbed by her mum.
What is it called when a gay guy punches someone?
Fruit punch.
What’s red and cries?
A skinned baby in a bag of salt.
Anyone else think High School Musical would have been a better film with a school shooter?
What has 2 wheels and screams? A disabled [person] I dropkicked down the stairs.
I'm Black, when a cop sees me, he shoots.
The terrorists got a killstreak of 2,996; they are popping off, bro.
Mom, what happens if you swear at a church?
Well, honey, a tee posing nun with glowing red eyes and nunchucks will beat you.
How many dead hookers does it take to change a light bulb?
Definitely not 13, because my basement is still dark.
Why did Sally fall off the swing?
Because she got shot. Dumb bitch!
VOTING QUARTERFINAL 2: LIKE: When the school shooter knocks on the classroom door and the autistic kid opens it.
DISLIKE: When the school shooter is gonna clap the football team, but his AK jams: “Take it easy guys, I was just joking!”
Vote for the better joke.