Violence jokes
Where did Sally go during the bombing?
Everywhere.
Why are school shooting jokes so funny? Answer: The bullets hit your funny bone!
A gay rapist saves a female rape victim, then rapes the rapist.
The weirdest thing happened yesterday. My dad came back from work... He’s a suicide bomber.
A guy walks into a bar with a 44 magnum and yells, "Who the fuck fucked my wife?" The guy behind the bar says, "Mate, you don't have enough bullets!"
How do you rape a girl?
By doing a tornado kick to your head since you stupid kids like rape jokes!
Why are so many Americans stupid? Because they shoot the ones that go to school.
What's pink, red, and silver and bumps into walls?
A baby with forks in its eyes.
(First Person): Knock knock, who's there? (2nd Person): Lemme talk to you, when we finna slide, what we finna do, knock knock, who's there, time to make a move, slayin' all then demons and we gotta move in too.
(Second Person): Knock knock, (1st p): who's there, let me talk to you, be careful where you steppin' out cause you ain't bullet proof, knock knock, who's there? time to make a move, block is full of shooters, and they didn't come to hoop.
"This is the dude who assassinated JFK."
"If you got a question, just shoot!"
Jack and Jill went up to an abandoned house.
Jack drank too much and unzipped his fly. Jack said, "You know you wanna." Jill said, "No." So Jack locked both of them in the house and put a gag in Jill's mouth, tied her to a bed. He ripped off her dress and underwear. He took off his pants and his underwear too, then put on a condom. He then put a pill in her mouth and made her swallow. One minute later she was asleep. He took off her gag and mounted himself on her, then stuck his "candystick" in her mouth, next her fanny. Then his condom broke, but he was too drunk to notice. Nine months later a baby's born and Jack's in jail as the father.
If you ever get mad, just hit an orphan.
What are they gonna do, tell their parents?
This kid lost Kahoot, so he shot up the school.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
One if you throw it hard enough.
Officer, I drop-kicked that child in self-defense!
You gotta believe me!
What do you do after you rape a deaf girl?
Cut off her fingers so she can't tell anyone.
So I went to Comic-Con and saw a man with an arm missing, and I thought, "Cool display," until I heard him screaming and getting the other arm chopped off. Then I said, "Man, now that's a 10/10 display, wow!"
How do you get ten babies in a bucket?
With a blender.
What do Catholic priests and school shooters have in common?
They both like to dump their loads into little kids.
+1 like = 1 kid in my basement.
+1 comment = 1 kid in my microwave.
+1 share = 1 kid in my blender.