Quote

Quote Jokes

Missing child

My favorite quote will always be, "Sketchy candy is better than no candy."

- One of the thousands of missing children.

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  • Shotgun

    My teacher told me, "You have no idea how powerful this quote is." I looked at her and told her, "You don't know how powerful the shotgun in my bookbag is."

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  • Attitude

    "The problem is not the problem. The problem is your attitude about the problem." - Jack Sparrow

    God

    If it's true what they say and I quote, "God never gives you more than you can handle," then you should pray to those who didn't, that God gave them a body strong enough to survive the attempt.

    Baby

    Dream tweeted, and I quote, "Babies kick pregnant women all the time, but I do it one time and I’m the one arrested."

    Memes

    Man

    A Person that puts a RickRoll in a book is actually the hero we all needed...

    A page of text detailing the life and work of Niels Bohr, a prominent figure in physics.

    Bill Cosby

    Santa and Bill Cosby's favorite quote: "Don't be dumb, make sure they're numb, and always use a condom!"

    Family

    I just wanted to say to never let go of family; they are everything. Never let anyone walk all over you. And if you are with me, like this quote.

    God

    "'There is no God.' - Stephen Hawking (2011)

    'There is no Stephen Hawking.' - God (2018)"

    Depression

    I saw this one quote: "The people who smile the most are covering the most pain." I think this is true, just not with everyone. As I am really depressed and act like myself with my friends, but with my parents and family, I force a smile so they don't worry more than they do.

    I did a test for my therapy session to see what level of depression I had. It came back with severe, 22/24, but I asked her to tell my mum it came back as moderate, saying I would tell her that my depression got worse. She went along with it, but I haven't told my mum and I now make things sound like I aren't as messed up as I truly am to my therapist.

    Smile

    Ruin a quote by attributing it to the wrong person.

    "Don't cry because it is over. Smile because it happened." -Adolf Hitler, 1945.

    Grenade

    I'll never forget my Grandad's last words... "Son, where did you get a grenade from?!"

    Beatles

    Two people are under the covers. The man says, "Quote the Beatles: Come together!"

    Beauty

    Beautiful people should read this quote: "God gave you beauty but not brains."

    Today

    Motivational Quote for today: If you're feeling tired and ugly today, cheer up, you probably won't feel tired tomorrow morning...

    Day

    Quote of the day: It's never too late to be what you wished you were.

    Hope y'all are having a great day! I just got back from a volleyball tournament that I had to be up at 5 AM for! We played three games and won the last one. We advanced and are playing a few more tomorrow. Wish me and my team good luck!

    Present

    Don’t feel bad about this day because there’s a saying: "Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. That is why it is called the present."

    Intellectual

    Motivational quote for today: if you think you're dumb, you're probably overestimating your intellectual abilities...

    Line

    If Adolf starred in the Room, his most iconic line would be “I did not Hitler! I did not!”