Hooker

Hooker Jokes

Difference

Whats the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead hookers, i don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

  • 4
  • Dad

    What's the difference between my dad and a hooker?

    Hookers come back.

  • 5
  • Sex worker

    A guy meets a sex worker in a bar. She says, “This is your lucky night. I’ve got a special game for you. I’ll do absolutely anything you want for £300 as long as you can say it in three words.” The guy replies, “Hey, why not?” He pulls his wallet out of his pocket and lays £300 on the bar, and says slowly, “Paint...my....house.”

    Drug Dealer

    What's the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer? A hooker can wash her crack and resell it.

    Mosquito

    What's the difference between a hooker and a mosquito?

    The mosquito stops sucking after you slap it.

  • 2
  • Lightbulb

    How many hookers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

    One, cause they'll screw anything.

    Job

    What's the difference between your job and a dead hooker?

    Your job still sucks.

  • 0
  • Difference

    What is the difference between a washing machine and a hooker?

    I can put a load in the washing machine without it following me.

    Difference

    What's the difference between homework and a hooker? They both start with an "H", but we all know which one we would like to do.

    Brother

    I was sitting with my little brother when he was about four-ish. He was starting to really like to identify objects for some reason, so he was showing me his toys. He grabbed his toy Mator truck and then pointed to the wheels, saying, “These are wheels.” I said, “Good job, yes they are.” Then he pointed to the bumper and said, “This is a bumper.” Again, I congratulated him. Then, he grabbed the toy’s wire with the hook at the end and said, “And this is a hooker.” I died laughing.

  • 2
  • Part

    What's the best part about a dead hooker? The second hour is free!

    Valley

    The real dead hooker joke is on all of us from the Fraser Valley in BC. You know damn well each and everyone of us ate that Pickton hooker pork. Considering it stretching from the 80's-2000's, pretty sure he got 4 generations of Valley folk with that Pickton pork.

    Depression

    They said I was depressed, I should make an effort to do what I love.

    I had to pay a hooker for twelve hours work.

    ... I felt nothing, but it was nice, being with someone who felt the same.

    Feminist

    What is the difference between a hooker and a feminist?

    If you want a hooker to be a bitch, you have to give her money first.

    Money

    How are Xbox servers like hookers? First they take my money, and then they go down on me.

    Stripper

    When you find out the stripper you're banging is a hooker, but you're saving money, so it's okay.