Violence jokes
I beat up a blind kid, but he says he's the strongest. He never saw that one!
You can hit an orphan, because who are they gonna tell? Their parents?
I had sex with twins. Well, I think it was twins. All my rage victims look alike.
So, a man walks past a gun store and sees all the guns are half price. Then the man says, "Wow, school supplies are low this week."
Don't break girls' hearts. Break their legs instead. They're two.
How it be when the new guy takes too long...
Hay Danny, it's me Johnny.
Johnny: Boss says to kill the guy in red. Point the gun at his head.
Danny: Ok, target locked. 3... 2... 1... bang.
Johnny: Danny, hope you did not get the man in red.
Danny: OH MY BRO FOR REALL.
If Will Smith had a revolver and said, "Who fucked my wife?" Chris Rock would say, "You don't have enough bullets, mate."
You just shot an unarmed man.
Well, he should have armed himself then.
Today I donated my watch, phone, and $500 to a poor guy.
You wouldn’t believe the happiness I felt as he slid the pistol back into his pocket.
Hello, anybody, I've just shot somebody. I did it on purpose.
If you are ever mad, punch an orphan.
What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
What is more fun than spinning a clown around on a clothes line at 100 miles an hour?
Stopping it with a pitchfork.
I was in the bedroom slapping your girl harder than Will at the Oscars.
What happens when an orphan is told that someone had found their parents?
They cry...
They scream... with joy.
"Oh wait, no, that wasn't your parents."
Orphan grabs a knife out of the kitchen, lets just say, the orphan didn't live to tell the tail...
I wish I was at a Western bar; then I would get shot.
My Crandall just be smashing more than you ON DA GIRLS, and he was slapping your girl last night harder than WILL at the OSCARS! ;)
Are you a knife?
Because I want to deep throat you.
If you ever get mad at an orphan, punch them in the face... What are they going to do, tell their parents?
What's the difference between you and me? You're not strangling a man with a cloak on.
What did the daddy bullet say to his son when he missed the bull and hit something brown and gross?
"That is bull crap!"