Use jokes
Why was the bee’s hair sticky?
He used honeycomb.
Do you know you’re supposed to wash your sex toys after you use them?
I guess that’s why Catholics invented baptism.
We're gonna have to kill
no good Jack and Jill.
They’re draining the economy doooown!
They’ve spent our budget on weed
and lube to spill Jack’s seed.
They’ve ruined our wonderful town!
We're gonna have to kill
no good Jack and Jill.
They have no moralityyyy.
They’re spreading degeneracy.
We ain't what we used to be.
We’ve got to kill ol' no good Jack and Jill!
Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water,
but then they stopped at the tippy top to smoke some marijuana.
They went to the store, and got some more, to fetch a “few” more beers.
Next day they came, ran off again, repeat for 24 years.
We’re gonna have to kill
no good Jack and Jill!
They’ve banked off buying boooze!
They’ll drink and sell the price
at the original times thrice.
Corruption wins, the avg. folk’ll loseee.
We’re gonna have to kill
no good Jack and Jill.
Their kids’re in the business tooo!
They’re draining all our banks.
Give 'em well deserved spanks.
We’ve got to kill ol' no good Jack and Jill.
Jack and Jill Netflix and chilled and made a grave mistaake.
What a blunder, there was no rubber, now they’re a house of eeiiight!
A bolt went off, they opened shop to resell their porn and lean.
It all went swell, but for us, well, we’re now an oligarchy!
WE’LL KILL OL' JACK AND JILL!
Why do vegans use blowjobs?
Because they can’t take real meat.
Why do vegans like to make their food look and taste like meat?
Same reason lesbians use strap-ons. They still like putting meat in their hole, but they don’t like where real meat comes from.
What do the Twin Towers and genders have in common?
There used to be two until they divided into multiple pieces.
I told a kid in a wheelchair that he should use his rocket league booster.
At the job interview, they asked me, “Where do you see yourself in five years?”
I told him, “I think we’ll still be using mirrors in five years.”
How do you trick a homophobic heterosexual male that is a Roman Catholic priest into using the glory hole inside the men's restroom at a gay bar?
Tell him that it is a confessional booth.
How can a pimp save money in buying condoms for his stable?
Answer: Have his hoes wash and rinse them after every use.
Why did Shakespeare only write using quills?
Pencils confused him: 2b or not 2b.
I really used to be into emo chicks. Now they just don't make the cut.
I used to date this girl only to find out she's a guy.
I guess you can say she had me in a trans.
Your mom is so ugly that she uses Snapchat filters to make her pretty.
I heard P. Diddy got a job as a defensive coordinator.
He’s used to penetrating aggressively.
President Joseph Biden said during the first presidential debate of the 2024 presidential election that he does not debate as well as he used to. Mr. Biden also can't think as well as he used to either, but then again when Mr. Biden was a United States senator in the state of Delaware he never could think because thinking was never one of his strengths and that is the reason why Mr. Biden became President Obama's vice president in the first place.
Oh well, that's politics.
You're so bald that Disney uses your head for movie scripts.
How do butts communicate?
By using CRACK-BERRIES!
I used to think 11/11 was mistakenly 9/11.
Why don't rappers use the subway?
Because they don't want to miss their next rhyme.