The 200+ Best Date Jokes

at a date : he: i work with animals everyday me: oh how sweet!what do you do? he:I'm a butcher

The first computer dates back to Adam and Eve. It was an Apple with limited memory, just one byte. And then everything crashed.

I saw a beautiful homeless girl and asked if I could take her out on a date. She politely accepted and enjoyed herself. Soon after I asked if I could take her home, she smiled and nodded her head. Her smile disappeared when she saw me running away with her cardboard box.

*Visiting Alabama* Pop Up dating ads be like: Never be lonely at cousinsonly.com

What is a pedophile's favourite dating site? Kinder

As a 13 year old, online dating is a tough thing.

Every time I meet someone new, they end up in jail.

When I see the names of lovers engraved on a tree, I don't find it cute or romantic. I find it weird how many people take knives with them on dates.

Dating a striper is like eating a bag of chips in class.

Everyone looks at you in disgust. But deep down inside they want some too.

What’s the difference between you and Jesus? Your parents remember Jesus’s birth date.

Oxygen and potassium went on a date. I heard it was OK

I used to date a girl named Ruth but she broke up with me and now I am ruthless.

When I see lover's names carved on a tree, I don't think it's sweet. I just think it's surprising how many people bring a knife on a date.

Father : "That's great son. Who is she?"

Son: "It's Tina, the neighbor's daughter".

Father : "Ohhh I wish you hadn't said that.I have to tell u something son, but you must promise not to tell your mother.Tina is actually your sister."

The boy is naturally bummed out, but a couple of months later

Son : "Daddy, I fell in love again and she is even hotter!"

Father : "That's great son. Who is she?"

Son: "It's Peny, the other neighbor's daughter."

Father : "Ohhhh I wish you hadn't said that. Peny is also your sister."

This went on couple of times and the son was so mad,he went straight to his mother crying.

Son : "Mum I am so mad at dad ! I fell in love with six girls but I can't date any of them because daddy is their father!"

The mother hugs him affectionately and says:

"My love, you can date whoever you want. Don't listen to him. He is not your Father."!!!

When I see the names of lovers engraved on a tree, I don’t find it cute or romantic. I find it weird how many people take knives with them on dates.

Hi! This is a good prank I did! Okay My sister has this crush and his name is Braylon so he text my sister saying he wants to hang out with her which I think means date so anyway I did this My text said "Hi braylon, I can't hang out today...or the other day because I have homework, so please no hang out!" this is super wrong but funny! Braylon text back and said "Fine I can help" and I text back and said "Oh will come here around 10:00" And my sister did not know he was comeing....she was so embarrsed she was still in her night gown! HAHAHAH. O to the k bye thats the prankster!!!!