Mirror jokes
A blonde woman was speeding down the road in her little red sports car and was pulled over by a woman police officer, who was also a blonde.
The blonde cop asked to see the blonde driver's license. She dug through her purse and was getting progressively more agitated.
'What does it look like?' she finally asked. The policewoman replied, 'It's square and it has you picture on it.'
The driver finally found a square mirror in her purse, looked at it and handed it to the policewoman. 'Here it is,' she said.
The blonde officer looked at the mirror, then handed it back saying, "OK, you can go. I didn't realize you were a cop..."
Sometimes I look in the mirror and go, "What happened?"
How do orphans have a family reunion? They look in the mirror.
The saddest painting you will see is a mirror.
Is that a mirror in your pants? Cause I can see myself inside them.
A mirror and a terrorist are the same... Only... a mirror doesn't need a gun to kill.
How do you know your acne is getting out of hand? The blind start reading your face.
I wish my hair was depressed.
Cause then it would cut itself.
Who can shave 20 times a day and still have a beard? -- A barber.
Your forehead is so big your inner thoughts echo.
What do you call a dad in the mirror?
(Your imagination.)
I would roast you, but your mirror does it every time you look into it.
Once I saw a mirror... and that was when I got the ability to become a ghost.
How do you know you’re ugly?
If you always get handed the camera for group photos.
When Chuck Norris breaks a mirror, the mirror gets seven years of bad luck.
My wife is like a mirror.
I can never look at it.
Me: Your ugly...
Person: I'm not your mirror...
Me: I never told you to be my mirror :p
I looked in the mirror yesterday. I still have nightmares...
Hey girl, are your pants a mirror? 'Cause I can see myself in them.
A mirror and a beer bottle are arguing.
The beer bottle says: "If you break me, you get one year of bad luck."
The mirror scoffs: "Oh, that's nothing. You break me and you get 7 years of bad luck."
The condom overhears these arguments and walks off laughing.